A well dressed bass boat has more electronic countermeasures than a WWII destroyer, now bank anglers get some love…

While the supercharged, wake tossing, bass boats wail off into the distance (with coolers full of beer and all the hot babes) The Lawn Chair Navy can get busy catching fish with their Fish Cam.

That groan was warranted, as a Korean company has introduced underwater live action camera depicting the worm’s eye view.

At $385 you had better not snag anything, as you’re about to go swimming.

Anglers with small hand-held TVs can see fish move up to the bait — and move their line towards them.

Likely we’ll see a significant jump in fishing license sales, as all of the joystick trained wunderkinder will be flocking back to fishing by the hundreds. The question remains whether you set the hook via the VCR remote or whether you still have to grip the rod..

Now all you have to do is jar a sixpack (or hotty) loose from the bass boat with one well placed rock, and walk your bait over for salvage rights.

Technorati Tags: Fish Cam, beer and hotties, bass boat, damn them

Fishermen and Vegas always want the odds favoring the house, I throw far too many stones to lust after a glass boat, so lets get some useful stuff this time.

Start with the Immobilizer, a 900,000 volt stun gun ($70)masquerading as a cell phone. This will fix a variety of ills – the crazed derelict emerging from the bushes intent on interrupting your fishing, the paint-baller that fails to acknowledge your white flag, and the teen that never gets off the phone.

It may even be capable of cleaning and frying your catch, ensuring you’re always under limit.

My favorite is the Cell Phone Voice Changer ($40) this beauty guarantees a day off of work so you can extend your weekend when the fish are willing. Twist a couple of knobs and you’ll  sound close to death, your boss may even send flowers.

Also available is a voice changer for land lines. For those that have exhausted all known illnesses via cell, this will get your building evacuated in no time. We don’t advocate this, but are smart enough not to use our office extension to originate the call.

Technorati Tags: voice changer, stun gun, how to get a day off work

It seems like every component of fishing has a 5 year span where the technology changes every time you blink. My old neoprene waders have served me really well, but I missed the entire “breathable Goretex” revolution.

I was hoping to avoid another sweaty Brownliner odyssey, and had ordered a set of boot foot Hodgeman WadeWell II hip waders. Hip waders have never had much of a place other than surfcasting and motivational posters, as their usefulness is limited. I wade like a drunken sailor, and hip waders is an easier way to get water somewhere where it ought not to be.

The “Little Stinking” is an exception, September flows are miniscule and about 24″ of water is all that I’ve encountered, other than stifling triple digit heat.

Boot foot waders with the traditional lugged soles give me some purchase getting in and out of the creek. Felt soles are fine, but always prove treacherous climbing or descending dirt banks.

Goretex uppers removes half of the expected weight, and the flexibility of a thin fabric versus rubber walled sheath, gives the feel of wearing overalls, rather than clumsy armor.

More importantly, this gives me a single fast drying object that I can clip onto a clothesline briefly, or set in the garage to dry. My proximity to the local creek means nightly usage, fast dry mean less exposure to sunlight, the nemesis of all rubber. The traditional neoprene and boot ensemble require a great deal more drying time, only because both inside (sweat)  and outer layers must be dried.

So far I am most pleased, we’ll see whether October usage is as pleasant, but for hot summer use, these cheap waders are just the ticket.

Update: After six months of heavy usage, they’re about the most comfortable wading boot I’ve used, update posted here.

Technorati Tags: Hodgeman Wadewell II, hip waders, summer weight waders, Goretex boot foot

The downside of working in fly shops is that instead of getting a paycheck, you get first dibs in the “going out of business” sale.

Downside because 30 years later I still have unopened fly lines in pristine condition, yet have run out of my favorite. An English company, Masterline, made a pebble finished dry fly line called a “Chancellor Chalkstream.” These were uncommon for their day, as both Scientific Anglers and Cortland offered only smooth finishes.

Hal Jannsen marketed these lines under his label in the early 90’s – they were dyed oddball colors, like purple or brown.

I see Masterline is still in business, but it doesn’t appear as if they make anything other than an introductory fly line. I seem to remember someone making a “beaded surface” or pebble finish line, but now that I am interested, I can’t remember who it was..anyone care to share some information?

The prevailing theory is that as the line exited the guides it skipped from sphere to sphere, rather than constant contact and constant friction – as such, they would shoot quite a bit further than a conventional line.

Late Breaking News: I found the last of the Chancellor lines, available at $135.00 each. That’s a dab rich for my blood, are there any made by contemporary companies?

I take my Armani clad shock troops out of the financial district; lock and load with laptops, cell phones, personal digital assistants, dry erase markers and ample frappachino, then plunk them into a “World Class Trout Experience” – hoping they will learn to “Think Like a Fish?”

I ‘ve been attempting to think like a fish for a couple of decades – finally decided that fish think rather poorly. I assume that this experience will teach your executives to mill aimlessly in circles when out of their comfort zone, to snap at brightly colored foreign objects, to flee at the hint of movement in your industry, and be gutted mercilessly when your company is acquired?

I think I would be a lot more comfortable with some form of predator metaphor.

“Together we put on competitive ‘waders’ and literally put your management team in the ‘water’ near the customer ‘stream.’ “

So they can flail around ineffectually, learn brand loyalty by changing flies constantly, expose them to superstitious ritual, go in over their head at the first careless step, and blame the weather for their failure to execute.

Nice. On day two you’ll have to teach them the difference between “watering hole” and fishing hole ..

The last couple of years I haven’t been able to find the Muskol liquid repellant and was beginning to fear that it was no longer made. Replacing it on store shelves was an assortment of products, flavored with Mango, Licorice, or Vanilla.

I read the dermatologist testimonials that framed each package, but failed to pull the trigger, opting instead to go with my last bottle of “the good stuff.” One vendor assured me the product was no longer made, and that 100% DEET had caused its demise.

I looked up DEET on the Web, curious what I had been basting myself with for the last decade. Not to worry, as prolonged exposure merely  mutates your chromosomes until reproduction is futile. I did giggle at the excerpt from the EPA:

” Sunscreen products are intended for frequent generous use, and DEET products are intended for spare infrequent use. “

It’s obvious the above author doesn’t fish, as most anglers slather themselves mightily prior to leaving the parking lot. I had always hoped that Muskol was introducing both a shampoo and a body wash, myself.

Fear not, Muskol is alive and well. It no longer boasts of “100% DEET” like the old concoction, now it is a 70% DEET, 30% Active Toluamides. DEET is a toluamide, so they may just be wordsmithing the container to make reproduction still seem possible.