Author Archives: KBarton10

… and a plague shall be upon thee

Brownliner\'s BountyLiving in one of the world’s great breadbaskets means an errant cast may bring great reward. Like Jed Clampett’s errant squirrel shot yielding “Texas Tea,” – I draped a backcast into the best part of a Hershey bar.

Last weekend was spent plying the clean water, and chores were dormant, so I didn’t have the opportunity for straying too far afield. The Little Stinking provided little action Sunday morning but did yield a bonanza of free food.

Selenium Almonds are one of the fringe benefits of tromping the path less traveled, I figure the root system filters anything meaner than I am – leaving just the tame byproducts like Estrogen and crankcase oil for the fruit.

I’ve got 10 trees within a single backcast, all wild and this year’s crop is a humdinger. Plunking a 10lb sack of these on the kitchen table goes a lot farther than a dead fish, so I’ll lump this into the successful outing category.

More confirmation that Brownliners are an invasive species, we’re locusts Babe .. adapt, evolve, and pillage.

Waders, Rod, Reels, flies, check .. foundation?

Cowboy up dammit, I don't want to hear you complaining about chaffing At least they’ve published a guide for guys to get them on without tearing them, from the angler’s perspective – that’s a start.

Back in the day, when the defacto wader was Seal Dri’s, I remember my buddies coyly hiding behind the truck as they donned pantyhose. It was unsettling, but layers were the only thing that allowed you to stand in icy water more than 20 minutes; pantyhose, followed by thermals, then pants, then those thin latex waders.

I was lucky enough not to have to grapple with transgender, as my brother had equipped us with O’Neil neoprene drysuits.

I figure this is where them 5% of anglers we lost over the last decade went, not sure whether they’re smarter than us or merely made of sugar, but I could embrace “manscara”eyeliner and “mancake” foundation – if they had a DEET base, and an SPF of 15 or greater.

If it repelled mosquitos and protected me from the elements, with a fitting that attached to my float tube pump, so I could apply mass quantities to large fleshy sensitive areas, why wouldn’t we embrace the change?

It may alter the parking lot ritual a dab, but so long as we can skip deodorant, we’d be happy, right?

For them as are not from California, and are recoiling in terror, relax. All you have to do is swear before you say certain words..

“Bob, pass me the %$#@ corn starch, these %$#@@ pantyhose are chafing hell out of me.”

Inflation fighting award to follow

wildcreek A split bamboo rod for less than the cost of a graphite?

One of those odd finds that you stumble on quite by accident, a handsome looking rod featured in an photo, and curiosity leads you to look up the maker.

Wild Creek Rods, of Australian origin and a small entrepreneur, but the rods are handsome and the costs are very reasonable. Only four models are available, but it’s still a neat find.

$489 US for any of the rods featured ($525AU), plus postage. Seven models of graphite are also available, for about $237 US.

A Hexagenia by any other name is still low in Trans Fat

Mayfly Lasangna I think it was the Existentialist movement of the ’70’s that insisted we “think like the trout, BE the Trout.”

If you’re still struggling with the concept you may want to eat bugs, then again, there’s plenty of other philosophies that would permit you to achieve “self” by eating Ice Cream.

There’s strong evidence that early on, people in Europe and the Middle East routinely ate insects. In the Book of Leviticus, for example, the text states that most bugs are taboo. But not ALL bugs, it says. “These you may eat; the arbeh after his kind, the sal’am after his kind, the chargol after his kind, and the chagav after his kind….” Most scholars agree that these are really names for the same critter, the locust, in various developmental states.

Somehow there’s always a trendy SoCal eatery involved, as Californian’s insist on being on the cutting edge of every dubious trend possible.

“Right now, it’s the ‘in’ thing,” says Brian Vidor, proprietor of Typhoon, a trendy Pan-Asian restaurant at the Santa Monica, California, airport.

About six years ago, Vidor added stir-fried crickets and ants to his already extensive menu. The word swiftly spread, and soon the restaurateur found himself struggling to ensure that supply would meet the demand.

I’m not so sure the angling community is ready for “Singlebarbed’s Guide to Tasty Ephemera” – but what better way to break new ground than to prove Hydropsyche tastes like shoe leather, and the LaFontaine Caddis needs Garlic?

If you’re struggling with all of this, go lick your windshield.

I’m getting fitted for my white hat

We may be the good guys for once I’m not so sure we’re not the good guys.

We travel great distances, spend gobs of cash, and when we’re lucky enough to outwit a fish, we don’t belittle it, make a guppy face, or give it the finger.

We slide it into the water or the fry pan as painlessly as possible. Some regard us as eccentric, some think us cruel, but all of us can agree that despite the quarry – there’s a hint of respect in all this.

Them other folks, the non fishers they’ve got some ‘splaining to do:

I’m thinking the moral high ground is ours for a change, and uncomfortable as it feels, bask in it while you can…

Every so often a really good idea isn’t

Sacred hour, the last 60 minutes before dark I see it as using turn signals in the city, all you’re really doing is giving information to the enemy…

Picture that rarified hour before dark, the lake is a sheet of glass, the fish are feeding in earnest, and tippet looks like winch cable on the surface. It’s “perfect” time, in 60 minutes either your execution is perfect, or you’re perfectly frustrated, it’s the only possible outcomes.

I’m focused on willing my 6X to be 9X, and someone to my right starts speaking:

“Yea, and remember my idiot sister with the cleft palate, well she married that loser dude you met. Yep, the short guy with the nose ring, that’s the one.”

Incredulous would be the operative word, some fellow 300 yards distant appears to have a two way radio glued to his ear, chatting with a buddy in a float tube. Conversational tones carry at least a half mile, and he’s emptying the family closet for the entire lake to hear.

“%$#*, I missed one.”

At this point, assorted Mom’s are hustling kids away from the shoreline, and I’m wondering whether my destiny will be, “%$#@, the fat guy next to me caught another ^%$# fish.”

Technology is a wonderful thing … at times. It holds much promise, but like the Atom Bomb, not everyone that can afford it should own one.

The running diatribe pauses long enough for me restore “last hour’s bliss” and I managed to fool a nice rainbow with a Pheasant tail. Sliding the fish back into the water the silence is punctuated with more blathering:

“Naw, I’m using a dry, I’ve never caught %$#& with Pheasant Tails, that what you’re using? &%@#, I missed another one.”

Well that confirms everything they’ve said about distracted drivers talking on cell phones, my discomfort is fading a bit with each announced muff – it’s irritating, but Loudmouth has his pants around his ankles for the amusement of all within earshot.

“OBAMA? %@*& him, I can’t believe you buy into that liberal &^%#*, Jesus.”

I can’t help you pal, once religion and politics dominate the conversation, you’re on your own.

… Hell, I can’t see my tippet anyways, time to call it a night.

I’d use downriggers but the Pink Lady objects

What’s really needed is some clever technical name like “Pre-emergent Taut drifting” or “Kinetic Nymphing” – something with enough action verbiage to engage the print media into reams of “how to” literature.

I figured it was trolling mostly, what with the wind blowing you in one direction and frantic paddling to counter wind drift, hoping to preserve your orientation to the bank and fly.

Kelvin used it to great effect and converted us skeptical types after only a couple hours on the water, more importantly, it produced fish during midafternoon when everyone else was thinking sandwich. 

The weeds are about six feet below me

The above picture shows the bottom of Manzanita Lake and its stunning water clarity. Them monstrous feet are submerged – and the vertical weeds are about 6 feet below me. Getting a fly in the weed is a bad thing, and the fish instinctively head for those tough stalks the moment they’re hooked, with us collectively losing a third of the fish on the initial sprint downward. 

The trick is to use tackle that keeps the fly about midway between weed and surface. This is the exclusive turf of the intermediate sink line – one of the slowest sinking lines available – or adding 5 feet of tippet and a beaded nymph on a floating line.

Sink tip lines would work as well, but the key is to keep mindful of the depth to the weeds, if you stray into the deep water the fly passes above their visual range, too shallow and your fly is toast. At the right depth, the cruising fish will oblige you. We landed about ¾ of the fish using a simple “fling and retrieve” and the balance from dry flies and nymphs during periods of insect activity. 

Brown J.Fair Wiggletail and Algae CarpKiller

Pre-emergent Taut drifting flies start with the J.Fair Wiggletail nymph (in brown above), Olive was the preferred color – which matched my most productive, the Algae CarpKiller. I had these in the box from the Little Stinking and equipped with a 4mm bead were heavy enough to drag 5 feet of 5X down to the appropriate depth.

My deteriorating eyesight has a new wrinkle for me to overcome with each trip – and the larger tippets and bigger hooks of Kinetic Nymphing  gives me a chance at threading a tippet come dusk.

Tradition is useful as long as it doesn’t interfere with the fishing, and delicate sensibilities are trod upon with gusto, it’s all part of the obsession. Unfortunately there’s more hours between bugs than with bugs and with us weekend warriors, every hour is precious.

It might have been an irate Conga soloist with a Ranger in tow, best play it cagey

I’m following in the footsteps of the Trout Underground, which has a winning combination for the extended fishing soiree … first you mention the menu, show a couple of water shots proving you were able to push yourself away from the table, then you mention dessert.

Unfortunately everything in California has sugar on it, so you have to guess which course is first. “Dessert” was the first fish landed, and it’s strangely fitting that a Brownliner’s pilgrimage to blue water starts with a Brown Trout … 

Me and Salmo Trutta renew a longstanding friendship

I’ve fished a lot of “mixed” water in the last decade, populated with both Brown and Rainbow trout – but for whatever reason I’ve haven’t seen that yellow belly and red spots since … forever.  Our first day on the lake  Browns outnumbered Rainbows, and everyone got to see a splash of yellow.

Manzanita Lake is about 5800 feet above sea level, and contains the only fish native to Lassen Park. Due to elevation and ice covering the lake, spawning occurs in late Spring, and the small feeder creek entering the lake provides precious gravel to sustain a natural population.

The above photo, a recently spawned fish that’s much skinnier than normal, almost “snakelike” – freshly spawned, more importantly, hungry as hell. After 14 hours of propelling myself around the lake, I’m not sure whose palette was the more discriminating, but at least one of us got fed. 

J. Fair's biggest fan, and another victim of the WiggleTail nymph

Our small flotilla chugged around the lake and did well; two kinds of mayflies, midges, and the breeze played havoc with all of them; nymph activity was constant and prowling fish were in evidence all day long. Hatches were morning, noon, and evening – the traditional Manzanita schedule, with Calibaetis hatching at noon and again in the evening. It’s too soon for the big noontime spinner fall, but with “two a day” hatches, it shouldn’t be too long before they’ll add to the festivities. 

Trout like Carp flies, a lot

“The Thrill that comes Once in a Lifetime” was how Ed Zern wrote it in “To Hell With Fishing”; the obscene discovery that big trout and Carp have an affinity for algae colored monstrosities. I didn’t complain much, just kept yelling “Pheasant Tail” to anyone that asked.

I was fishing dammit, and a little white lie won’t add much to the flames of Hell … the last thing I needed was some fellow accusing me of intentional invasive species release – knowing that fly had dampened both the blue and the brown.

Besides, it may have been the irate “Conga Drum” soloist with a ranger in tow.

I’ll post some flies and useful methods tomorrow, I had to get the “fish porn” out of the way, buying me enough time to see if I have any left. It’s the unwritten law of the “best friend” fly tier, “Guys, before we get in the car the flies are a buck, but once my waders are damp – dries are $9.50 each and nymphs are $14.00…”

We survived, but the Mormon Tabernacle buys it

Coin operated showers sealed our fate, and if the “Mormon Tabernacle” in the next campsite could’ve held a tune on the Conga Drums, we might not have had to show ourselves and chase their womenfolk away.

Lots of smoke in the background

Paddling around the lake for 12 hours a day doesn’t breed sophistication in dining. Black dark doesn’t assist much, but it’ll hide the worst of the culinary transgressions..

“Did you just put Toothpaste on my steak?”

“Oops, sorry – It looked like the steak sauce bottle.”

“That’s OK, put more on I’m starving .. ”

“Oh my god, you just drank the dish water!”

“I did? Was kind of bland, pass me something colder.”

I can only wonder what the neighbor’s thought – our campsite was peaceful and deserted from dawn till dark, then some land yacht squeals to a stop with 3 tubes on the roof. The unkempt and unshowered wolves emerge, take down a bison, char the edges, rend it to pieces, then start snoring.

The glottal kind, add three different pitches and even the Black Bears left us alone.

Smoke from the Butte Lightning Complex was thick, and that allowed me and the rest of “McHale’s Navy” to doctor our hooks with whatever we squirreled away in float tube pockets. “Skipper” brought some ungodly Peanut Butter protein bar that tasted better after it was run over twice by the vehicle, but despite the embedded gravel made a handsome facsimile for Power Bait.

Who invents this stuff? It's like leaden death.

After finning around the lake all day, I wasn’t about to waste my remaining larder on damn trout, I’ll take the gravel, you eat the bugs.

We’ll cover the fish stories tomorrow, right now sleep and a shower sound better.