The Cyprinid Finger, How Stupid Big Fish continue to ignore me

There’s a point where swear words are completely ineffectual and only  snagging can express your true feelings for a balky adversary. With small fish it’s the thrown rock that creeps unbidden into your psyche – but with the big brute measured in kilos, only a large treble can restore lost honor.

Watch my latest offering pass unmolested

While most of you have some small traces of scruples, I do not.

I spent the early part of Sunday hidden in the tules lining the bank making casts to large, fat, fish in excess of 15 lbs. After failing to even make a fish pause, I ransacked my collection of itty-bitty flies for a 4/0, and finding none – mentally calculated whether it was possible to construct the equivalent with dried grass and a couple hundred #8’s …

It was something primeval … old school, and had nothing to do with conservation. I’d release it after I was done, but only after hitting it a few more times with a rock.

So much for the carp fishing, I matched wits with them yet again and came up fishless.

I moved further up and did quite well, hooking and long-lining a nice smallmouth, and landing the first big fish of the season -  a super aggressive Pikeminnow with a taste for his master’s boot …

Some shreds of composure returning, by my standards, you see it as further depravity

… and we caught the rare “Orange Finned Bull Trout”- popular among those that fancy adipose fin photography …

The Orange Finned Bull Trout

Especially popular amongst the unfortunate anglers whose primary quarry gave him the Cyprinid Finger, despite pockets full of test flies and sure things.

Note: I’ll be doing extensive work related travel between now and Christmas, so posting will be shortened and brief, and only part of each week. This gives you a welcome breather – and allows me a bit of time off from the relentless invention of news that you would as soon do without.

You can blame Bin Laden for your lack of felt soles

He's restored us to greatness One of the great frustrations of fly fishing has been our collective hope that the rest of the planet would view our small hobby as something larger, perhaps embracing it as a way of life, or reason for a conservationist Jihad …

… how through us society would stop tossing empty water bottles into the creek, how we would adopt sustainable fisheries by letting a few small ones go, and would restore the reverence for Mother Nature, rather than letting industry blacken both the bitch’s eyes instead.

We were ignored with little fanfare, so we played the invasive species card; with us merry band of outdoorsmen alternately infecting or defending all comers from Green Slime – and the spectacle of your city streets coated in slug tracks while your women were hunted by multi-armed creatures with eight eyeballs …

Still they yawned at our quaint, yet “fringe” message, given their offspring were tatted as to be indistinguishable from the Alien Menace, and their womenfolk were already hunted by nearly everything able to carry a beer … cold or otherwise …

But to restore us to prominence is the news that we’ve regained the Holy War label, now that its been revealed that the World Trade Center was merely a diversionary raid by Al Qaeda – and Bin Laden was after bigger payback, infecting the nation’s food supply …

… or infecting McDonald’s, which is pretty much the same thing.

Dozens of foreign insects and plant diseases slipped undetected into the United States in the years after 9/11, when authorities were so focused on preventing another attack that they overlooked a pest explosion that threatened the quality of the nation’s food supply.

At the time, hundreds of agricultural scientists responsible for stopping invasive species at the border were reassigned to anti-terrorism duties in the newly formed Homeland Security Department – a move that scientists say cost billions of dollars in crop damage and eradication efforts from California vineyards to Florida citrus groves.

via The Huffington Post

In another couple of months this will be blamed on the Democrats or the Republicans, but we’ll know what really happened …

Was I CalTrout or Trout Unlimited I’d have a dozen lawyers filling out grant requests for defending the borders in the absence of all those Ph.D’s allocated to something else …

What do you call a girl with two black eyes, other than moth bait.

Now they want the soft hackles We call it “Teardown Wednesdays” – where midweek shows and no massive oil spill has occurred on your favorite waterway, no invasive species is blissfully munching its way through your garage roof, and your daughter appears interested in an egghead for once, versus “SPaZ” the class psycho-killer …

… and you breathe that long sigh of relief knowing that the weekend is close, the home team is 4-1, and you might just eke out the remainder of the week as a 99%’er without suffering further…

Which is why we delight in grinding those rose-tinted spectacles underfoot, as we showcase the demise of your feather collection knowing greed will architect the demise of your soft hackle stash, given the speed you’ll pile these onto eBay.

It’s the next fashion menace designed to have you at war with Momma and the entire feminine contingent, which you know you can’t win.

kirk_by_your_side

Now that the premium saddles have been purchased for the next couple of years the unscrupulous have entered the market with every other feather, selling everything from bundled goose biots to Turkey blood feathers, and the howls of the duped are as loud as those glimpsing Two Girls, One Chalice

It’s a great way to unload all those freshly discovered moth infestations. Just empty all the eggs out of the bag, smooth over the chewed part, and call it hair awesomeness …

Where we adopt more downtrodden orphans and get them all muddy and foul smelling

I was reminded that my recent trip to the woods failed to include all my pals and therefore some proof of kinship was in order. All them road miles leading up to my “whang-leather” hardened-frame had not been shared with other road-conscious neighborhood residents and somebody was owed …

Some-thing was owed … and mightily …

bad_Doggy

As he’s a product of a “broken home” whose owners flit about the Northern Hemisphere slurping aging grape juice, ignoring any real responsibility, which is the hallmark of the true Californio, given we only tinker with Sushi so we can amuse tourists…

… and as Little Meat lacks any real pals to play with we did the Mud Junket, only this time absent any real supervision …

live_crayfish

So we spent most of the day catching fish and making crayfish swim so we could capture their silhouette accurately. The gaily colored “mud bugs” being lightning fast swimmers, and appear only as a set of claws being drug behind the body, with no other movement apparent.

Except the jaws on Little Meat, who finds them quite the treat when they’re exhausted …

… and outside of the week-old flatty cottontail we met on the trek into the creek, offers an opportunity for the rare roll should we find them already deceased and upwind.

Now that I’ve properly tuckered his fuzzy little arse out, I’m permitted to boast of our outing …

When two tips is good, and three tips would have been better

Last week’s trip to the Pristine was the first I’d used my RISE 9’ #4 as the main rod while relegating the lightly injured Sage LL 905 as my backup. The Sage reel seat epoxy had given up the ghost last season and tightening the reel seat occasionally results in the rod butt removing itself from the wood insert.

Which is it? I’ve been lazy given the repair is easy enough. I just need to find something with a fine point to spritz a little epoxy under the rear hood to make the problem go away.

While the RISE rod performed admirably under the steep, rock-hopping climb of the plunge pools, it didn’t like the back of the truck much – and after a small tangle at the tip between a partially strung rod and a fly imbedded in a fishing vest, I lost the top 3” of the tip without having a chance to defend it.

It’s not a defect so much as the odd leverage of the tangle, and while I’m still unsure how it happened, I was thrilled at the prospect of owning a second tip. The next morning I’m back on the water blessing that choice of foresight and frugality, and with a march ahead of me I put the rod together, but saved stringing the rod until I got closer to the water.

You sure? It’s one of the things I learned as a guide, what you think may be on the water never lives up to reality, so I hike down from the parking area to scan the water versus force feeding fish with my best guess.

/beginrant

I’ve not been a fan of the trend in four piece construction – mostly because every ferrule deadens the rod regardless of how light the material is, and figure most rod makers are victims of their own press, which assures us that four thicknesses of graphite when mated flex like two.

As they’re no longer asking us anglers what we want, three ferrules must be better than two, which is why a nine foot rod is now broken into four 27” sections, even though there’s no need.

/endrant

… and as I’m parting the bankside willows, ensuring I creepy-crawl slowly to blend in with the foliage until I can scan the water for working fish, I suddenly realize that the top 27” of my rod is missing.

Hell, I made it easy for you While working through the willows, something had hooked one of the guides and pulled the tip right off the rod, and now I’m on hands and knees looking for a two foot length of brown, amidst a lot of brown things.

This didn’t end well. A 27” section of brown rod tip resembles every willow twig imaginable, and there was no chance of my finding the missing section.

I learned an important lesson given that it could of been much worse, and the car and my backup rod weren’t close by. Always string a four piece rod – even if it’s the end of the evening and you just broke off your fly, and can hardly see.

Reeling all that line into the reel is the expedient thing to do, but 27” of your rod tip can be removed without your ever knowing, and that fly line is the only clue you’ll have about being hung in a branch.

That last hunting trip with your buds

If you’re still intent on impressing your pals that you’re foreswearing jobs and responsibilities, wives, and all other forms of material constraints – how it’s all about the fish, the woods, and damn little else – I’ll call that bluff.

There’s little to fear, as outdoorsy trials go you won’t have to do much other than sign a piece of paper now

holysmoke

Later it may not be so easy, but at that advanced stage of the game, who cares?

Perhaps a grand sendoff for an old retriever – who spent the last couple of seasons licking his balls by your fire …

… or now that your spouse, who bitterly resented the time spent on your outdoor passions and both your rod and gun collections, has finally passed this mortal plane, you can spread her ashes complements of 10 cases of shotgun shells – containing everything from teeth fillings to wedding ring …

… and when the warden complains of  steel shot only, you can get all tearful about how it was her last wish, to use them gold fillings and gall stones to take out an entire V of geese – when the lighter steel merely rattled off the wing coverts.

And when you march up to St Peter at them Pearly Gates, you can do so knowing that the wife and kids are looked after – as the last thing some interloper will see is you coming across the living room at 900 fps …

We left the beads at home, enjoying the spectacle of “weightless” fishing for a change

Nope, there’s no gaudy beads or feelers, no articulated body parts or rare materials to keep you from owning these killers immediately …

… although there is that trust thing …

Nor will I mention the hair extensions you’ll have to tear out by the roots, or the groans of the feminine members of the household as they watch fashion disappear into the firm grip of your hackle pliers …

Yes, the Boys of Summer – the top killing flies of my recent trip – were all dries.

Silver_Creek_Dry

Most of the fish killing was the result of my earlier experimental the “Hovering Predator.” Little surprise given that it has the mayfly upwing when dry, the downwing of a caddis when wet, and as much deer or elk as a full dress Humpy or Elk Hair Caddis.

The fish above gave it about a microsecond before inhaling the beast deeply.

Fiery Hovering Predator #16

These are so much quicker to tie than a Humpy, and uses only about three turns of hackle per fly, relying instead on all those trimmed deer hair butts to give it a high floating three point stance. I doll it up with floatant to preserve the mayfly silhouette in slow water – and fling it without regard for dampness in the faster currents.

Hat Creek Yellow Sally

Second best was the time honored Yellow Sally I was introduced to at Hat Creek. Bright yellow body and scarlet egg sac, natural elk tips and ginger hackle complete the fly.

The Little Yellow Stone is a summer constant in the Sierra’s – and anything yellowish is sucked down with great glee by fish used to seeing it flutter by. In low light and with old eyes, it’s a welcome spot of white that can be seen immediately, and makes us geezers on equal footing with the younger crowd.

I tied all my dry flies on the fancy barbless tournament steel for the last two years. Not so much a preference as it is research in progress, a future article that may aid you in calculating their value to the casual angler.

Where we eschew Wild Trout in favor of the Wild

With all the attention on the West and East Forks, in light of a wild trout designation and the attendant hordes that frequent such places, it’s not surprising we opted to dabble in the group scene on the East Fork – and spent most of our time on a much smaller creek found by accident, whose virtue I felt was largely intact, despite the many pilgrims whizzing by in search of the wild or trophy fishery.

Silver Creek, Wolf Creek Bridge

Small streams offer an intimacy that large streams do not, and I’ve been too long away from their welcome tinkle; where the muddy footprints are yours, the scrape of a cleat on granite sounds jarring, each plunge pool a mystery, and each fallen log welcome shade from which some silver lightning bolt will materialize or vanish.

They’re always physically arduous, doubly so when wearing the restrictive rubber band of waders and the full fishing regalia that accompanies new water – where you’re not quite sure if you’ll need every fly ever made, and double that for tippet …

… where with a precarious foot on the uneven rocks of mid channel, you can wipe the sweat from your hat band, gazing backward at the steep grade you’ve already fished, and forward towards the unknown – and the steeper incline it hides. Where you can pause for a welcome blow that comes from knowing that those out of shape couldn’t last – and only D. Boone and his ilk are fit company.

Silver Creek from Highway 4 above

Silver Creek drains Silver Lake (Ebbet’s Pass) and offers something pretty to look at while plunging down Hwy 4 to the East Fork of the Carson below.

Access is limited to the occasional gravel pullout and from the Wolf Creek and Silver Creek bridges – which bookends the long downhill run from Ebbet’s Pass to the East Fork.

All the fish are planted and seem to distribute themselves throughout the watershed, in contrast to the balance of milling, confused throng in the bridge pool.

Silver Creek Rainbow

A Silver Creek rainbow pulled from a deep plunge pool complements of an experimental dry fly.

It’s the kind of “shortened-leader, slam-it-down” dry fly fishing favored in these small stream, steep gradient creeks that drain both sides of the Sierras. The fish are not overly selective so much as opportunistic – given the insect will be lost in the bubbles in a fraction of a second, and their diet is equal parts aquatic insects mixed with odd bits of pine needle, leaf fragments, cigarette butts, or anything looking about the right shape and size.

Kelvin_Silver_Creek

It was completely delightful to simply exhaust yourself in the climb, lose yourself amid the intimacy and charm of the small stream experience, and then scrabble up the slope to the freeway, reminding all those air-conditioned faces pressed to the glass that the woods is an awesome fearful nightmare, populated by scratched and sweaty fat guys on the verge of a heat-induced coronary.

May all who fish here enjoy it as much as I did

I’ve got enough solid information after spending the last four days afield to keep you entertained for a couple of days at the least … But before we get into all those tales of daring-do, the overcoming of adversity, and the weakness of wild trout for Peach yogurt, we’ve got the odd tale of the Bridges of Alpine County …

… and how the local chamber of commerce, in an effort to woo those painfully scarce vacation dollars have decided to treat us fishermen especially good, by paying for a constant stream of brood stock to be pumped into the shaded pool at each local highway bridge.

There to be fought over in a hail of pre-dawn Kastmasters, Rooster-tails, and every BB equipped nymph known to Angling-kind.

West_fork_bridge

Rather than accidentally enrage anyone at the concept, I’ll go on record as having no issue with carnage of any kind – fly or otherwise. Nor do I care whether a brother angler kills his fish or spares them. I’d suggest an only caution that at this late stage of the game, it might be prudent to only kill what you can eat, given most of the world’s fish supplies are dwindling and many are already farmed, and wild-caught anything is in ever-shortening supply.

As I’d not been to the Carson River before, and eager to begin assimilating data, I slowed to a halt at the first bridge and its gaggle of parked cars drawn onto the shoulders, to present my hindquarters to traffic while I peered over the rail and into the depths below …

… there to see six or eight anglers frantically lobbing death at an imaginary spot 14 feet under the bridge, wherein lay the precise phalanx of recently baptized hatchery fish finning silently amid the concussive thunder of thrown polished steel.

A stringer at the bank attests to fly fishing’s superiority, and the owning angler proudly displays a limit of five 4-pound fish, most belly up, but the occasional movement of a fin suggests while imminent, death is still at arm’s length.

I complement the angler on his catch, while ducking him and a pal lobbing two BB shot and a beadhead nymph back-hand under the bridge.

His advice was to be repeated by every grocery store, gas station, waitress, motel employee, or good natured local, who like stock market pundits – each had a favorite bridge and the knowing wink that accompanies, “ … and they just planted there last week.”

I’m just not used to it.

The bulk of my excursions in recent years have had some wild trout agenda or restriction, or I was simply far enough removed as not to have a lot of human interaction, angling or otherwise. While none of this makes me blanch overtly, the scene was repeated so many times over the course of the next four days, it makes me wonder whether the contented angler, as defined by Fish & Game’s “Put and Take” hatchery management – isn’t having the out-of-doors removed from his piney woods experience.

Certainly a concrete abutment isn’t a pine tree – nor is the constant hum of overhead traffic, which can never be confused with normal “woodsy” wildlife noises or the sigh of a light breeze in the tops of tall pines. Whether you’re parked on a sunny rock or Styrofoam cooler, the watchful gaze of those spectating – and those coveting your spot – must make the multi-hour drive no different than the checkout of the local grocery store, with the warden displaying momentary outrage when you’re discovered  bringing 9 items to an 8 item checkout.

The thoughts about bridges came unbidden, in part because of the reflex stab at the brakes when you encountered them undefended, and part because I wondered if there wasn’t a larger notion involved.

On one level, twenty pounds of hatchery fish dipped in five days worth of clean water, isn’t quite like dry-rub ribs, which can be smoked for eight hours then flamed to perfection. Rather, six months in a concrete trough eating dough-bait and floating excrement from the fish next to you, then baptized in a bit of clean water will make you pasty-flavored at best, given the temperatures of that trough aren’t cold enough to build firm and succulent flesh …

… which means my brother angler is about to show his spouse (and his entire neighborhood) 20 pounds of pasty white flesh that tastes only a bit better than licking the glass of an aquarium …

… and fourteen pounds of it will likely wind up lining his or his neighbor’s trashcan.

Which is the tiny bit of censure I’ll allow myself, given that wanton body count is a feature of my Dad’s sport (and his Dad’s sport) and we can no longer afford such waste.

But the other thoughts that came unbidden – was how the bridges serve as some unlikely metaphor of us as anglers; how we leap into the sport as young and impressionable, largely unaware of anything other than catching – and how with a bit of maturity and some experience do we realize much of what draws us back is between the bridges, and how as we acquire experience and preferences, spend most of our angling careers there.

Dry fly Purism, Wild trout, fly tying, conservation, and entomology, are a small fraction of the many wonders of that journey, as is the out-of-doors and the incredible environments wherein we find ourselves and our quarry.

… and later, when old age and infirmity permits only a short shamble from the car, how we return to those bridges – and how welcome they are given the certainty that one day, from some unfeeling hospital bed, even they will be lost to us.

West Carson - Hope Valley

Like you – I am still mid-journey. I left the comfort of the bridge and its supply of wallowing fat fish and walked the entire valley following the West Fork of the Carson while it wound through grassland and willows. A bit down the trail was a park bench with an inlayed brass plaque inscribed, “May all who fish here enjoy it as much as I did” – with a brother-anglers name who died some eleven years ago.

While the water and watershed were intact, there wasn’t a fish to be seen in the entire three mile walk.

A stunning watershed with classic undercut grass banks and deep outside bends that would have held large wary fish – requiring hands and knees sneaking versus marching to the edge and flinging a downstream cast.

It was a rare glimpse of some fellow’s treasure, a relief that he was no longer part of any issue, nor could see his past glories diminished – and a bit of thought towards our unique form of stewardship given those Bridges of Alpine County.

It’s like your Momma, only she hands out Adams’s if you’re good

Back when I was young and virile they invited me because of all the dope I smoked I was in tune with the fish, I knew what they ate and where they slept at night …

Now that I’m simply another aged burden on society, I’m thinking that with this new slimmer physique, how I’m liable to scamper over those steep railroad embankments like a damn Gazelle, and how them as is with me will be sweaty, panting, and begging me to hold up.

Polenta_Italian_Dinner Then I heard them self-same pals at work mention, “Him? Yea, I’m, going with Fatty, mostly because the SOB cooks better than my wife – and is the only source of Grizzly hackle between here’n Nevada.”

I think the term is “crestfallen” … but it might be “dashed” instead …

Now that I know my real value I’ll be serving Livermush and Collard Greens to the next group of rowdies, and you can kiss my %&# for a replacement Yellow Humpy – or anything else for that matter.

The real trick is simple and hearty food designed to warm a fellow from the sudden chill of elevation and the beginnings of Fall. Layers of Polenta and Pepper Jack, draped in a flavorful bath of spaghetti sauce infused with Basil and Bay leaves …

I’d describe the result as a “slashing rise” – there’s no timidity in the take.

East and West Forks of the Carson. Be there. Today.