Category Archives: Fly Fishing

Part 2 – Virtual Big Box, Orvis resellers and the debut of the cosmetic second

The marketplace for the hardwired angler Where’s them damn bargains you hinted at?

The Orvis resellers on eBay are Adam’s Outlet, a fly shop in Austin Texas, and Redwoodloft, a wholesaler in Virginia. Both companies have essentially the same Orvis inventory, but Adam’s Outlet is a fly shop, with a broad range of tackle and resells Hardy, Cortland, and Scientific Anglers rods.

Redwoodloft markets tackle under both the Redwoodloft and Redlineloft eBay stores.  One deals in the tackle and the other sells all the clothes, in the last month they’ve adopted the Adam’s Outlet model, and Redlineloft appears to market the bulk of their rods.

Too much filler to pass inspection (the only blemish I could find)

They’re the Big Boy’s, combining for nearly 50000 sales of Orvis products, it’s two “mean old dogs” warring over the same turf, adopting each other’s sales pitch and tactics, and evolving their offerings to maximize profit.

Other vendors exist, like Virginia Wholesalers – another largely Orvis reseller. In excess of 10000 sales – and in traditional style with incomplete sizes and disjoint quantities. They’re in a similar mode as Redlineloft – lots of clothing and sundries, rods and fly lines.

The eBay trail is forked and elusive, many vendors buy from other eBay sellers for resale under their own “tent.” It’s a common practice – and one glance at their buyer’s feedback will show where they bought the tackle from and how much they paid for the item.

Peeling the eBay Onion

We need definition and nomenclature to assist in answering the burning question, “exactly what are these rods and what’s my risk in buying one?”

Orvis Factory Second Badging

Badging” is the practice of marking rods with maker’s name, rod attributes, and series information – we’re so used to seeing it we hardly give it a second’s notice.

Orvis rods on eBay have three styles of “badging”; “traditional” – identical to the rods in their catalog, with the addition of a small “R” branded on the cork grip. These are likely production overstock without flaw – simply offloaded to make room for next year’s models.

“Incomplete” – the rod specific information on the blank, the presence of the “R” on the cork, and “Orvis Graphite” in place of the normal rod markings. As the badging is different than production it’s likely these are cosmetic seconds, removed from the assembly process once some minute flaw is found.

More recently is the “Orvis Factory Second” label with “R” on the cork, and rod specific information. This could be a response to someone removing the tell-tale “R” off the cork and attempting to pass the rod as a full price purchase.

Both “Incomplete” and “Factory Second” styles lack series information on the blank, nothing identifying the rod as Zero Gravity, T3, Green River, etc.

Orvis Graphite Badging

All of the resellers have different explanations, and the “R” on the cork has been the subject of much conjecture.

Adam’s Outlet insists, THIS ROD IS NEW. THE CORK IS MARKED WITH A SMALL “R” SO THAT IT CANNOT BE RETURNED TO ORVIS FOR A FULL PRICE REFUND. ORVIS WILL REPAIR THE ROD FOR A FEE IF BROKEN.

It’s understandable that Orvis wouldn’t want to extend carte blanche to a rod resold twice, but not mentioning it may be a “factory second” is a tad unworthy. It may or may not actually be a blemished rod, chances are it was sold to them as such.

Then again, Adam’s Outlet has more than one version: THIS ROD IS NEW,WITH ALL FIRST QUALITY PARTS (BLANK AND COMPONENTS). THE ROD HAS NO DEFECT BUT MAY HAVE COMPONENTS DIFFERENT FROM THE CATALOG VERSION. THE CORK IS MARKED WITH A SMALL “R” SO THAT IT CANNOT BE RETURNED TO ORVIS. ORVIS WILL REPAIR THIS ROD FOR A FEE IF BROKEN.

Using different components may be consistent with an “end of production” run of rods, wherein the maker simply builds what blank stock he has left with what fittings are scattered about – yielding a rod different from the catalog glossy.

Redwoodloft (Prior to 5/1/2008)

 Note:  “R” on cork grip indicates rod has been refurbished.

Refurbish may be something different than what I imagine – to me refurbish means the rod has been used and a component needs repair. A rod owner intent on repair wants the rod back, where would Orvis find a stash of “used” rods to refurbish? This may be a semantic issue (see Orvis comment below).

Redlineloft (after 4/1/2008)

CONDITION: As pictured, rod is brand new, never used and in ORVIS rod sleeve (Color of sleeve may be tan or green). First grade cork (marked w/ a small “R” to prevent returns to Orvis – see photo). Orvis will repair this rod for a fee if broken.

James Hathaway of the Orvis Company has the best answer:

“The R stands for “Really Awesome”

Actually, you are correct, it stands for “Refurbished”. They are rods sold at our tent sales and things like that.

“Tent Sales” suggest the occasional “maker’s premise” type sale – held on special occasions and in limited quantities – belying the multiple thousands of rods sold through eBay.

For civilians with less principles, sanding off the “R” on the fully badged rod is child’s play. Orvis’s badging the rods with “Factory Seconds” and vendor greed seems to have partly addressed this problem.

Both Redlineloft and Adam’s Outlet are canny profit motivated vendors, they’ve got a lock on the market and selling a rod for double their money is good, but quadruple is better. Both vendors have adopted identical practices, rather than auction the rods they “fish” for anglers unfamiliar with their method.

How they’re Sold

The rod debuts on eBay as a “Buy It Now” sale, often at $250 – $500 price. The accompanying prose mentions “new PRODUCTION rod” and the MSRP is listed on the advert, showing the purported $600 new – only $350, so buy it now!

On the surface, that’s a $600 rod at nearly half price, and they sell plenty to the unwary. Both parties are happy, great transaction – and the only “foul” is the fellow could have purchased it for half that.

If the rod fails to sell, it shows up as an auction the following week. Starting price for Adam’s Outlet, 99 cents. Redline/Redwood starts it at $99 for the high end, less for the lower end tackle.

Both the “Buy It Now” and auction sales are seven days duration.

A canny consumer notes the rods listed from the vendor as “Buy It Now”, waits a week and bids on the rod he wants via auction.

Both vendors appear to be selling the same models of rod (see below for what’s available), so the best deals are when each has the same rod at auction. Often they’ll replace the recently sold with an identical model, and the two of the folks competing with you just bought one – suddenly your competition is greatly reduced.

It’s not necessary to be so discriminating on the larger lined rods, you can usually get the lines 8-13 with little competition. The market for large rods is much smaller, with AFTMA 9-13 garnering only a few bids each. In many cases you can get a traditional 9ft. 9 weight for the initial bid – $99.

That’s one hell of a bargain for a $600 rod, and it’s a self fulfilling prophecy, the patient angler gets the cookie.

What’s Available From these Lads

I’ve included the Excel ebay_vendor_record.xls spreadsheet of the rods sold by the two vendors, this file lists the models, pieces, line weight, series, opening price, and final sales price for January – March 2008. I’ve included both vendors (on separate pages) so you can see the magnitude of sales.

These statistics are from the feedback logs on eBay, which are pruned each month. Each vendor retains about three months of live log, so you can see what they’ve done recently – I saved these months so the facts aren’t lost with the pruning.

In my mind, the magnitude of sales is formidable – none of the shops I worked at could hold a candle to either vendor, in the best of times.

For completeness, assume 15-20% of the sales were not listed, unless the purchaser left feedback, the sale will not show on the eBay log, so you need to boost the dollar totals to compensate.

Who’s Hurt by all This

That’s the toughest question of all. Certainly the “little guy” gets a nose bleed – he’s stuck with last year’s inventory without the options of the manufacturer – and lives in fear that Sage or Scott may cut off his supply if he unloads them at cost.

The manufacturers solve the near term dilemma of what to do with unsold inventory, but pays dearly in reputation when their retail outlets find out they’ve been misled by a “do as I say, not as I do” posture. The retail chain won’t squawk too much – they’re dependent on product to add legitimacy to their storefront – without Simm’s or Sage products can you call yourself a fly shop?

The manufacturers can take injury if their practice becomes widely known and the reseller supply ample – no one will buy their $700 rods anymore – we’ll all wait 12 months and get it for $150.

You’ve got the tools, the available models, and the method, I’ll let you decide what to do with the knowledge.

Thinking outside the Box

Many are skeptical of the eBay process, assuming the vendors are not as safe as the local fly establishment. The shift from “human” vendors to companies has been largely missed by the casual shopper. There’s still plenty of human foibles and interaction – but the eBay marketplace seems dominated by established retail and wholesale outlets – not someone cleaning their attic like it once was.

Fly shops that adapt well to the e-Marketplace are doing a phenomenal business. Case in point, Leland Outfitter’s of San Francisco – to assist customers in the purchase of new rods and reels, they’ll take your old tackle and auction it for you on eBay. Professional photography and web savvy has given them a market no other fly shop has an inkling of – more importantly, all the used tackle sells smartly. Angler’s profit because their $700 rod is now $500, and Leland sells additional new tackle, a positive outcome for both participants.

Shoppers are still more comfortable doing business with a store – a great opportunity for a small shop with unconventional vision.

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It’s either why I can’t catch anything – or they can’t dribble

My what big hands you have, GrandmaInstead of bills there’s a fishing mag waiting in my mailbox. I’m cradling it tightly threading my way through cars, chores, and girlfriends, hoping the porcelain throne and it’s locking door will provide me the uninterrupted ability to digest it properly.

Fly fishing magazines are “anti-matter” for the Playboy’s of our youth; the former is read by looking at the pictures, and the latter digested by reading only the articles…

.. at least that’s the story Ma got when she found my stash.

Grab any two covers off the current crop of angling literature and you can’t help wonder why these fellows weren’t first round NBA draftee’s. Most anglers are sturdy enough, of unknown size as they’re usually crouching –  and all possess a singular trait that the NBA scouts have to covet..

… hands bigger than their head.

Is it a freak of nature, or is this the reason I’m only marginally successful? Is the Spey rod craze merely an excuse to get a longer cork handle – so them “cover-guys” can get a comfortable grip for once?

Wouldn’t surprise me one bit – but it’s a tad discouraging, all the “fly tyer” covers have guys with normal hands, so we’re to toil in frustration while “Meat” goes home with the Prom Queen?

Dammit, I thought them days was a chilling and distant memory.

With the multi-million dollar contracts of the NBA, these lads are either philanthropists or they can’t dribble.

It certainly gives me pause – but I’m odd like that.

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Get enough virtual bricks and mortar, and you’ve created both a Big Box retail outlet, and the World’s Largest Fly Shop

Tough times are on us and if it’s not on sale it’s not a priority. Too many folks strapped with burdensome mortgages must make do with less, and the repercussions aren’t limited to the the fly fishing industry, it’s all industries, part of the Recession they whisper about in hushed circles.

We haven’t had one in 20 years or more, for some this will be an eye opener, coupled with the decline in the US greenback and 4.5% inflation and your dollar has to work much harder.

Virtual meets physical Fly fishing is a niche sport, and while rich folks aren’t likely to be affected, the rest of us will tighten our belts – with the obvious luxury of $800 rods and $500 reels, I expect to see the retail landscape get thinned considerable.

There’s multiple reasons for what’s coming, economics is the primary driver – but most fly shops are poorly capitalized and poorly run, compounding their burden. It’s a labor of love for proprietors, not the “last man standing” predacious Capitalism common to larger industries.

The manufacturers won’t help at all, their allegiance will quickly run to the “Big Box” stores in an effort to weather the coming storm, putting additional price pressure on the little fellow down the street.

So who’ll survive? Not a simple answer, but two styles of shop should continue to tread water; the small destination shop that has all the flies for the local waters, and the canny fellow that leverages the Internet to broaden his customer base.

I’m thinking eBay is the biggest winner, and some startling facts are coming to light after spending the last four months researching this “e-tailing” auction behemoth.

“I’m more interested if they have clearance items,” she said.

EBay is the undisputed King of clearance; it sells trash and exceptional items with equal ease. It boasts a friendly intuitive interface and allows unlimited sales without distinguishing between individuals and companies.

Hundreds of small fly shops make use of their auctions, a roughly equal mix of small seasonal destination shops and larger city stores. Most hawk their wares at retail prices, giving them a robust electronic “second market” or lengthening their season, making them independent of their locale.

So where does that new rod go after it doesn’t sell? The same place everything else goes – eBay.  It’s a potpourri of folks downsizing their garage, relatives selling Grandfather’s estate, and “bricks and mortar” stores taking advantage of the ease to market interface – to dampen their toe in e-commerce.

It’s the same story with last year’s tackle, eBay represents an enormous outlet for clothing, sundries, and last year’s graphite rods – it’s the largest fly shop in the world, and many fly fishing manufacturers are assisting in a way that’s not obvious.

New is better, and we’re reminded constantly in the angling periodicals. 65 million modulus was last year – this year it’s 73 million modulus, and if you have an ounce of decency – you’ll buy two…

Clothing and rods change every year – and small retailers can’t keep pace. Destination shops with a 6 month season – can’t unload high priced tackle as easily as urban, year round, stores – who are struggling to sell $800 fly rods in a worsening economy, and have an additional obligation having to stock a “comprehensive” shop. Rods and “big ticket” items make only a small percentage of yearly sales, yet they command a lot of inventory dollars. The rapid evolution of models leaves the “bricks and mortar” vendors struggling with old stock and assimilating the latest “improved” models.

Orvis Cosmetic second and its label While the “little guy” struggles with low-margins and high-prices,  manufacturers dump their leftovers on the wholesale market. Freed of the burden of hundreds of last year’s rods, manufacturers introduce next year’s model, unleashing their advertising juggernaut with little regard for their traditional distribution chain.

It’s the unspoken rule of the rod making community, “.. you will not undercut my pricing, and if you do we’ll cut you off.” It was the constant in my 20 years of fly fishing retailing, little has changed for the small shop today.

A shop’s only price flexibility is when they build their own brand on manufacturer’s blanks.  The occasional demo rod can be sold as it’s been handled, but margins on prebuilt rods are paper thin, making the smaller stores especially vulnerable to the whim and timing of manufacturers.

“Cosmetic Seconds” is a unique practice and not all vendors offer “blemished” rods. In the past it was limited to “warehouse only” sales or special events at the maker’s premises; that’s changed with the electronic marketplace, it now boasts a multitude of sins and advantages, and a canny angler can be both stung, and count coup.

Many eBay vendors boast of such deals, it’s more than rods and tackle, it’s dishes, hunting knives, and car tires. Rods are a microcosm of the larger practice.

A cosmetic second is a rod that’s passed the inspection of the blank, is structurally sound and is wrapped and fitted for sale. Either the final fit incurs a blemish on reel seat or cork, or the finish has a flaw that prevents the rod from passing final inspection.

It could also be a rod produced and not sold, excess inventory at the manufacturer’s facility – and is a real liability in an industry that does not allow drastic price reductions to dispose of leftover models.

I contacted Echo, Scott, Orvis, Winston and Sage, hoping for information that would illuminate this process better – but only Winston and Sage responded. Orvis acknowledged the missive but did not respond.

Sage was characteristically terse, “We do not sell any blemished or second quality blanks or rods.”

Winston elaborated a little: Our policy is that we do not sell “Seconds” or “blemmed” rods. Each person who handles and rod is empowered and expected to stop production of the rod when a problem is found. For example, if a builder notices a blem in the finish of a tip section they will not use that section but rather destroy it and get a different section. At that point they will ferrule the rod out and then send it to the next station. Then the person at that station inspects the rod. If all is good the rod continues through until it ends up in inventory. The goal is for every rod in inventory to be perfect.

Neither vendor distinguished between the “factory second” and excess inventory, nor could I find evidence that they wholesale excess product on eBay.

Surprisingly the Orvis Company of Manchester, Vermont is the largest contributor to the eBay phenomenon. Because of the volume of items and vendors found, it suggests this is a significant source of income – and a method of employing a “big box” style distribution chain without owning it publicly. It allows them to remain above the fray – retaining their “little store in Vermont” image – while undermining vendors that must sell their product at strict retail.  

I’ve researched the feedback logs of a half dozen Orvis resellers, who combined have sold nearly 50,000 Orvis items since January of 2008. The bulk of their sales are the seasonal clothing Orvis sells, but among their totals are more than 2000 Orvis rods, thousands of Orvis fly lines, flies, and all the terminal tackle necessary to equip a couple regiments of hardened fly fishermen.

The rods are selling briskly, averaging 22-25 per week, and I can’t think of any fly shop that does that kind of volume anywhere. In these declining economic times, I’d think some of the existing Orvis dealers would want a shot at this profit cow.

Orvis T3

Last year’s Orvis rod, a discontinued model or cosmetic second, starts it’s eBay life somewhere between $90 and $250 – a tasty bargain for a $600 flyrod. The trout models usually end up selling for about $180 (includes postage), and the larger line size rods (greater than AFTMA #7) sell for slightly less. Current rods sell for a higher premium than older tackle, despite one rod being only 6 months older than the other.

All the Orvis series are available with the exception of the latest rods. The Orvis “Helios” is available from many fly shops with storefronts on eBay, all offer them at traditional retail prices.

“Zero Gravity”, “T3”, “Green River”, “Clearwater” and “Silver Label” rods are available from wholesalers, but despite selling many hundreds of the rods, their selection is incomplete. This suggests “excess inventory” offloaded to jobbers rather than Orvis’s systematic use of a new sales channel.

Scientific Anglers and the venerable Hardy of Alnwick appear to use a similar mechanism, though neither is a mainstream US vendor – Hardy is based in the UK, and Scientific Anglers has all but left the high-end rod market, relying instead on their fly lines for the lion’s share of revenue.

A canny “e-tailer” likely starts the auction near their cost, within 15-20% of what’s paid the manufacturer. They have a steep discount because the manufacturer is motivated, get a break for buying in bulk, and get to charge higher than normal postage, a huge revenue stream for eBay vendors, with many charging $20 or more per delivery.

With little detail other than auction prices, I’ll assume the vendors are paying about $80 for each Orvis high-end series rod, with the price ratcheting downward based on series – and their target demographic, entry and mid level anglers.

eBay empowers the seller with only two tools; the “Buy It Now”, and the traditional auction format. Auctions are typically seven days duration, with  hopeful anglers driving up the price. There’s little consistency other than the final price, as many retailers start their rods at 99 cents, playing havoc with my guesswork.

Pricing for Zero Gravity, T3, and the Trident TLS series typically started at $99, Silver Label around $75, and the Clearwater, Green River, Streamline rods at $20. The implication is the manufacturer is selling the rods to the wholesale vendors to recoup their materials, fittings, and labor, and generating profit – it’s a canny operation, but it’s likely to cost them later.

In my opinion, Orvis has provided a glimpse of what today’s rods cost to make. A pristine rod ($700) may yield around $595 profit, allowing for a simplistic calculation based on a $20 aluminum case and linen rod sock. That’s a 566% profit margin. For a niche industry like ours that’s required – you can’t sell millions of them – there’s not enough millions of us.

It reaffirms my “old guy” sensibilities that no contemporary* rod is worth more than $200, and thanks to the miracle of e-commerce, I can guarantee I pay a lot less than those that do.

Stay tuned for Part 2, wherein we look at the Big Boy’s of Orvis’s eBay vendor community, their auction practices, and how to score a $600 rod for a quarter of the price.

* Contemporary rod is defined as a mass produced rod from synthetic materials, spat onto a sheet of waxed paper, rolled under intense heat and pressure like a Twinkie, then fawned over by fanbois’.

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Minnesota Hardcore Angling – not the Garrison Keillor stuff, neither

JeanPaulLipton To say I’m jealous is an understatement, he’s got twice the amount of oddball fish available – most with “roman” noses, lips mounted downward, and tubercules, all likely spurned by the angling “blue bloods.”

Recently added to my blogroll, “A Roughfisherman’s Journal” features the Northeastern version of Brownlining; foam fringed tamarack bogs filled with voracious fish that would send a Spey caster screaming for his Mommy.

The downward spiral of the major fly fishing magazines continues unabated, driving the odd, different, and “off the beaten path” fishing into the Blogosphere.  I’m a sucker for rough fish content – and it’s nice to see some other brave soul fishing the unpopular water, and liking it.

From the look of things Jean Paul’s outfishing the rest of us handily. For the honor of my state I’ll attempt my traditional pathetic retort – “Yea, but we got more communicable diseases in our water…”

Wander over and acquaint yourself to Brownlining, Minnesota style, he’s a bit close to the vest revealing the secret flies, but we can shame him into it.

Brownlining, we welcome aquatic hitchikers, zebra mussels, and rock snot – it’s what’s stalking us from the streambed that scares us …

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Alosa Sapidissima, where art thou?

I need only the rumor that someone’s smelled one to pack the truck, it’s a byproduct of months of tying drab earth-tone flies that resemble insects, suddenly the artist busts loose and your tying bench is a riot of forgotten fluorescence, shiny tinsels, bead chain, and chrome hooks.

 Watt Avenue access of the American RiverThe Shad are at the mouth of the American – I have to drive by daily, cursing all the guys that called in sick and were miraculously cured when they donned their waders. Too many bait and spin fishermen to make a fly angler anything other than unpopular – but the fish will move up river as soon as they’re able.

Fish were caught at the Howe Avenue access Saturday, but the river flows are quite low, which may impede their march upstream to Folsom Dam.

I tried the Watt Avenue access for a couple hours yesterday with little success. Using an 8 weight shooting head (type IV) I caught enough streambed to lighten my fly box by a couple dozen – so you’ll want to use lighter gear or slower sinking heads.

Mustad no longer makes the 3908C (silver) hook and I had a hell of a time finding the venerable Eagle Claw 1197N (Nickel) hook. Only Cabela’s still stocks them in quantity, ($7.79 per 100, good price) none of the fly shops I searched has silver hooks outside of the standard Mustad 3407/34007 saltwater styles. I’m not quite sure what everyone else is using as a replacement.

Shad darts and Red and Green Tomato's

The “traditional” shad darts are shown in the foreground above, simple floss bodies, streamlined profile, and bead chain eyes to add weight and flip the hook over.  Shad have paper thin jaws and there’s better purchase on the upper lip than the lower. The balance are what I’m using this season, I call them red and green “Tomato’s.”

Next month the run will be in full swing, and likely I’ll be in the thick of things, as shad fishing is a “drinking Man’s” thoughtful sport – warm temperatures, balmy weather, half nekkid rafters and “silver bullets” that don’t ask for quarter – and don’t give any.

Keep an eye on your backcast – the urban setting always means some interested onlooker is behind you unannounced. Fish barbless, they’re easier to extract from a screaming jogger.

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I fought the water and the water won

That’s the problem with being a member of the “working press” – what with the brutal deadlines, the fishing, and the lying-about fishing, I needed some decompress time  – so I went fishing.

Sometimes you just lay the rod down and smell the roses

I threw some fishing tackle in with a change of dry clothes, adding some beef jerky, Kashi bars, and some bananas, and pointed the rig north. I knew it was early still – but the lull that follows Opening Day is well known; all the faux-Sportsmen bust out for the Opener, alternately freezing and burning – then lick their wounds the following weekend.

I hit the Upper Sacramento on Friday and Saturday, and she hit back. Heavy bruising water – cold and swift, and deep enough so that anything more than a couple feet off the bank was a tenuous ambition.

Wading alone you’re prudent and cautious, and I tip-toed around the heavy stuff hoping to find a pocket of something with minimal IQ and low standards, but they were all abed.

Insects were evident but they were trickling off unmolested, two or three different mayflies and the occasional lumbering Giant Stone, as the birds were inactive, everything made it into the underbrush.

No fishermen, no fish, and plenty of water.

I did have the opportunity to meet Tom Chandler of TroutUnderground fame, a friendly and gracious fellow that opted to share the Upper McCloud. It’s a tad unnerving to fish with another blogger – in the back of your mind you know that one false step and you’re cover art.

The Lower Falls of the McCloud River

As both of us were packing cameras we were on double good behavior, I used fly floatant on my dry flies, rather than Velveeta, and he did likewise.

A whirlwind tour of the McCloud waterfalls proved opportune – as they’re still swollen from snow melt and in rarified plumage.

The Upper Falls of the McCloud River

Neither of us caught any fish – but as the photo’s attest, who cares. It’s a bit early still, TC measured the McCloud at a chilly 48 degrees, so you’ve time yet.

I found the $4.00 per gallon gas starts about 200 miles upstream from me, anyone thinking they won’t be curtailed by the expense is kidding themselves, as a tank-up and a tank-back adds $100 to the outing and that’s enough to give pause.

… and no, I didn’t wear my Brownline waders in all this pristine-ness. Formula 409 is a snack for those beasts – I left them in the back yard to control the cat population.

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We’re assuming standard "cover two" formation

The Computer Fishing Glove - coming soonWe’ve seen clothes that can store and generate power, what’s always been in doubt is what we need the power for….

The Boys at MIT have answered part of the mystery with the HCID (Handwear Computer Input Device), a glove based computer interface currently destined for the military.

“Old Guys” use fishing to “get away from it all” – but the Youngblood’s want to bring it with them, interfaced digitally with their cellular network, their Blackberry device, and satellite if needs be.

Why? Hell, that’s the easy part – so they can taunt their pals.

Can be a versatile electronics platform for a variety of possible
devices (e.g., metal detector, lifesign sensor, etc)

Select the view mode of your helmet-mounted display without having to take your hand off your weapon or vehicle handgrip.

Translation: Film the proceedings midstream and upload it to YouTube without changing the grip on your rod. Dial your buddy and via the audio component question his ancestry, simultaneously grinding your point home with slo-motion or instant replay.

Input commands into your computer using intuitive hand-arm gestures

I’m assuming you can desensitize the device to the common fly fishing hand gestures:

You should have been here last week

I was here first, don’t forget I’m next to you in the parking area

My fly is imbedded in your ear, no hurry, but could you…

You’re blind, that fish was no more than 10″

Nice fish, you hooked it in the ass so it doesn’t count

I’ve none of the good flies left, I want half of yours.

Large hole in my waders, I’m done

Warden visible

Tailing loop and split shot, you’re in jeopardy

My sandwich might have Salmonella

 Spinner Fall

My flybox is headed your way, grab it before it sinks

You’re wasting time with that fly

You’re mistaken, I did not take the last beer

It’s safe to cross here, you first..

(Props to the lads at unconventional.airsoft.com for their illustrations.)

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Momma ain’t here to protect you

So I drug him all over Hell’s Half-Acre and returned him to Momma broken and sunburnt. It’s said “Revenge is a dish best served cold” – but I served it hot, rationing his water brutally, driving him like a beef to market.

I’m not vindictive most times, but eating them dirty socks in fourth grade wrought a terrible retribution; marginal fishing, 90 degree temperatures, and miles of gravel creek bed – no respite, little remorse, and less sympathy.

It’s the “little brother syndrome” – by accident the big lout was older’n me, requiring me to run screaming to Momma at the slightest affront. Now with civilization hundreds of yards away, it was payback time.

igneous_rock

Occasionally I let him fish, heckling from a safe distant, mindful that I was going to have to run like hell if he got pissed. It’s my home water and while I’d hoped to crush his spirits further by outfishing him – that wasn’t in the cards.

All I could do was tell him to cross the river at the deep spots, fling rocks – and claim they were monstrous and hungry fish rising for Twinkies, and expose him to enough Selenium and Mercury to alter his genetic material.

I don’t expect I’m completely even, but fourth grade was covered nicely. We haven’t addressed anything more recent nor the “Igneous Rock” nom de plume … Hell hath no fury like a blogger heckled by his brother …

The beauty of it all is Ma don’t read the blog, so even if he rats me out there’s no proof. I’m expecting the worst however, shortly the phone will ring and the salutation will start with, “Damn, Ma’s cookies are good…”

Rat Bastard.

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They’re worse than teenagers and have twice the stamina

Which may be the reason they’ll be here long after we’re gone.

I rolled out of bed early Sunday, hoping for a repeat of last week’s bug fest, and to make sure it happened I left the dry fly box on the kitchen sink. It’s reverse logic – if I brought the flies nothing would pop – but if you forget them, hordes of the little buggers will be coming off.

As always, the odds favor the house.

I stopped at the Sex Pool to watch the Carp spawn, it’s an amazing display and four phalanx’s of fish were blowing hell out of the flat water. Each phalanx is a single female bullied by six or seven males – and they herd her up and down the creek, through rocks, brush, car tires, barbed wire and anything else in the way.

I waded out in their midst to record the action, figuring fish porn is popular, but the “good stuff” is worth money…

The swirl hides 7 fish, 6 teenagers and Big Momma

They were oblivious to me and I pounded the far bank for bass. I had replaced the missing “Manhattan Leech” flies – and needed to determine whether they were “all that” – or merely a fluke.

A big largemouth came out of the water with the leech in his gob, and two of the Carp squadrons were in proximity, he managed to tail walk into their midst sending everything scattering for cover.

I’m not sure which fish to watch as I’ve got two 12lb fish headed for my crotch thinking I’m cover. Instinct wins, I assume a deflective stance – the bass wraps the tippet around a snag and snaps it, and the “Nut Missiles” discover I’m a human and slam on the brakes..

I retreat hastily, the voyeur thing was fun but I can’t hang with the stress..

The Manhattan Leech, fish love ‘em

New fish are showing up regularly, and I assume they’re moving downstream to repopulate the areas scoured by winter floods. A lot of scarring is evident on the fish caught – suggesting they rode out the high water somewhere with better protection – but show the wear and tear from being buffeted about.

The creek bottom is covered in minnows – approximately the same age, not more than an inch in length. Great forage for the big fish that survived – these may be what I saw (and caught) last season in the 4″- 6″ size. The small fish stretches are still devoid of life, which is the one mystery remaining.

Any fish fool enough to get caught a second time gets a name, it’s part of the luxury afforded to “home water.” That really big Pikeminnow that swallowed the dry fly last week ate the leech this week. The reel screamed nicely and “Old Lacefin” was both pissed and chagrined. He’s got a nickel sized hole in his right fin – instantly recognizable to me – so I protected my nuts…

Old Lacefin - left fin has a round hole punched in it

Fish hold a grudge – and after my earlier brush with Death, I flinched badly. The drab winter colors are giving way to their traditional hues, and anything capable of making my reel spin backwards is both pretty and welcome.

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I was weak and went with the Variant instead

“Former” commercial fly tiers have all types of foibles, scars, and nervous tics – it comes from being hunched over the vice staring at dust motes, dim lighting, and tiny hooks.

I have a “love-hate” relationship with the noble Elk Hair Caddis; it’s a great fly, buoyant as hell, sturdy of construction, elegant, simple, and effective. It has earned its rightful place as one of my favorite dry flies – and continues to earn my wrath as a fly tyer.

Genetic hackles are the culprit, you get some elegant, long, size 16 hackle – with enough density and barbules to really make a well dressed fly – and you palmer it up the Elk Hair’s shank burning up 2/3’rds of all those great chicken genes – you’re left with not enough hackle to tie a second fly, and too much to throw away.

Cue nervous tic.

Even though we’re retired – we still hate waste. It’s the reason we have 2000 extra size 22 hooks and only two dozen 16’s, or why our neck drawer has 84 immaculate ginger capes – and all the brown and grizzly is picked over – with even the moths chanting in protest.

Every season I suffer bouts of “post traumatic customer syndrome” – the sweaty night terrors resulting from tiny flies ordered in massive quantities, with me already behind schedule. 

Chuck Stranahan solved my Elk Hair dilemma with an introduction to the Caddis Variant. It’s as simple, as effective, and uses less hackle – something us former tying whores can really appreciate.

Dun Caddis Variant

Use the fingernail to press the wing flat against the hook, in doing so it’ll flair the wing horizontally into a fan covering nearly 90 degrees. 3 turns of oversized hackle completes the pattern. A standard genetic neck hackle can tie two of them, making them easy on the budget as well.

Change the colors to suit whichever critter dominates your local water. It’s an elegant sparse dressing that floats like a cork due to the large surface area, for me it’s a wonderful change of pace from tying the Elk Hair Caddis.

Chuck Stranahan is featured prominently in my “night terrors” as he was the proprietor of Hat Creek Anglers back in the day. Every conversation started with “I need 100 dozen #16’s …” then we’d talk about the small sizes…

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