Category Archives: current events

Fishing a growth industry? Maybe for the legal profession

Englebright Dam on the lower Yuba It sure looks like migratory fish are the new growth industry for the legal profession, another lawsuit filed here in California seeks the elimination of two aging dams on the Yuba River.

The Daguerre Point (1906) and Englebright (1941) dams just upstream of Marysville, they no longer produce power, water, or serve as a flood barrier – but they continue to impede salmon.

Federal agencies acknowledge their continued impact on fish, as neither dam has a functioning fish ladder.

Removal or successful mitigation of the obstruction would add nearly 100 miles of additional spawning habitat. In light of this year’s overall decline in returning salmon, it may add additional pressures on the Army Corp of Engineers, their current owner.

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Just when you thought it was safe to stick your toe in the water

Think again.

This isn’t one of those silly hijackers requiring you to dance around with a bottle of 409 hoping the neighbors don’t notice, this sure ain’t something you can point a finger at and bemoan it’s presence – no, this is something much better, with big sharp teeth that abducts terriers and small children.

“Frankenfish”, aka, the “Giant Snakehead” is forty seven times more deadly than a McDonald’s Big Mac, and can consume an adult human in a week or so … depending on its mood.

Toothy little morsel, photogenic too

The species easily adapts to any freshwater habitat, including ponds, lakes, reservoirs, swamps, streams and drains. Eggs are laid in a sunken nest of vegetation near the shore, and the young are fiercely guarded by the parents. Full grown specimens can cause severe injury to humans who might inadvertently step near the nest. Juveniles are striped brown and black, and travel in large shoals.

The IGFA record is a 39″ specimen weighing nearly 21 pounds. If it liked your submerged buttock, you’d sure know about it quickly.

Some poor fellow landed one in the River Witham in Britain, and the natural concern is they may have achieved a foothold on a new continent. No additional sightings have been confirmed, but a lot of ecologists are gnawing on their fingernails as a result.

Be very afraid, the Snakehead can breathe air and walks on land..

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmU7etSYYqI&feature=related[/youtube]

On a morbid personal note, (and because TC expects it) it’s about time we had a good stand up fight instead of a “bug hunt” – us or them, Baby. It may prove our finest hour.

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For them with questionable social skills

I get to be insensitive until tomorrow, you need practice Set the beer down and back away slowly, you insensitive brute.

Tomorrow, Thursday, February 14th, is Valentine’s Day, and “Ma” craves a little action. It’s one of the three or four holidays that require you to think about someone else’s “tackle” rather than your own.

Why I want to save you is unclear, a reminder of your obligation is warranted however.

Nothing but dinner is saying, “I forgot.” Girls know this – but she’s much too polite to mention it, instead she’ll wash your fishing vest and empty a bottle of starch into the pockets. Dinner out after acknowledging the event that morning, is a different story.

Gals require you to suffer and since they smell good, it’s okay. Flowers and candy, dinner out, all of these are viable tools, but it’s the delivery that sets them apart.

Candy and flowers in the morning says, “I remembered.” She’s not expecting some lavish diamond, she might not even care for candy or traditional stuff, all she craves is a little attention. The undivided kind.

Don’t thrust a Snicker’s bar at her when she steps out of the shower, pretend she’s a large trout – and kinda stealth up to your gift. Ditto for flowers, you don’t hurl them like the morning paper, hand them to her with all the petals intact for once…

Remember, this is the grand old gal that raised your idiot kids and packs your lunch without a thought for herself, and she’s damn well worth every drop of sweat required.

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I’ve thought of fly fishing as many things, addiction was right up there, rehab wasn’t

Check for a file in the fighting butt None of the past offenses are mentioned so I can’t determine whether this fits the traditional pattern of self destructive behavior.

“I used to make cane and graphite fishing rods, and tie flies as a hobby when I was on the street,” said Jeremy Loyd, an Arrowhead prison inmate. “I approached Dave Block (a Correctional Industries manager) with an idea for making it a business and an educational program.”

On the surface it sounds like it satisfies the incarceration / rehabilitation model, but knowing our passion for fishing is he merely trading one downward spiral for another?

Yes, I’m joking – but the question remains.

There’s no telling what I’m capable of if a flotilla of inebriated water skiers dampen my fishing, or some insensitive brute on a mountain bike impales himself on my flyrod. If the crime scene evidence goes against me – would my wrapping your graphite rod be punishment, and for whom?

I’ll leave my faith in professionals, they do this stuff full time; but were it me, once back on the street, I’d be hawking dry flies to school kids in no time.

The Complete Vindication of the Trout Underground and my public semi-heartfelt apology, well almost

I see this as a complete vindication for Tom Chandler and the Trout Underground. I’ve teased him unmercifully about “scantily clad strumpet” posts being his undoing, he counters with the “… new advertising paradigm you (expletive) Meathead…”

Heartfelt apology, american style

I’m not surprised, he’s a talented writer known for elegant prose and sloppy hot dogs, I’m merely the dog that whines at his feet hoping he’ll let me crap sometime this century.

For them as has fished for a couple decades, Aberchrombie & Fitch used to be a real tackle store, and before its current reincarnation the old San Francisco store had four floors of gear; two for clothing, 1 for tackle, and 1 for guns.

I remember smashing the Piggy Bank when I heard about the “going out of business sale” – and still own the Hardy Perfect I got after “coldcocking” Grandma, wrenching the reel from her fingers, and applying both boots to her.

Don’t look aghast, that reel was only forty bucks, at today’s prices – you would’ve shot the old gal.

Calling someone “Mr. Abercrombie & Fitch” used to mean he was attired in the finest of outdoor clothing and a conspicuous overconsumer, now it appears the meaning is something vastly different.

Police confiscated two display photos of scantily clad men and a woman from an Abercrombie & Fitch store and cited the manager on a misdemeanor obscenity charge, authorities said.

Based on the above, Tom’s correct – the new advertising paradigm appears to be gathering momentum, “partially clad” sells like hot cakes and us “wannabe’s” are just that. I don’t dare ask Tom who he’s been writing copy for – anyone wanna guess?

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Once upon a time on an irrigated desert far, far, away…

An Oscar winning screenwriter in the making Nothing like clever lawyers and a wealthy client to add convoluted logic to an untenable position.

The large farm interests in southern California lost the last round of law suits and were forced to make do with less – less water pumped south to irrigate desert, and less to make the lush lawns of Los Angeles bloom year round.

The declining “Delta Smelt” was the root cause, protected by the endangered species act. Not content with this setback, the water districts are suing the Department of Fish and Game and the State of California for allowing a foreign species (Striped Bass) to predate on the smelt population, which likely is the real cause of the declining population.

As proof of this horrible crime, the document points to the DFG’s attempt to restore the Striped Bass population to its historic norm via planting.

I give them an “A” for creativity, and my extended index finger for environmental conscientiousness. Not only are the evil stripers the bane of delta smelt, but it could be they’re destroying the salmon population at the same time.

No mention that the striper fishery has gone to hell roughly at the same rate as the smelt and salmon, but that’s consistent with a good Hollywood script, omit the details that’ll make the story sordid.

I’m not sure who orchestrated the plan, an out of work screenwriter on a binge, or an astute legal beagle that has a helluva future in movies…

Stay tuned, there has to be a partially clad heroine emerging from the underbrush momentarily…

You can’t sell your house, but if you could, here’s 20 locations for a buyer’s market

The SubPrime mess affects everyone, likely he's defaulted already If retirement is less than a decade away, you may want to start mulling some options. For you, Field and Stream listed the “Top 20 Best Fishing Towns in America” – most are chosen by gamefish, but that’ll be a fair rebuttal to “Top 20 Retirement Towns Chosen By the Missus, Because Her Ma Lives There.”

Forget about selling your home now, six or seven years from now the banks will be considering lending money again, and you’ll be positioned to pounce.

California just barely squeaked in – the Little Stinking has not yet made the “must do” list for the Jet Setter crowd, so the Trout Underground is the beneficiary with Redding, CA at number 19. Having lived in Redding for five years I can agree with their assessment of the fishing, everything else was a damn lie…

The beauty of this part of the country is that you can be up in the cool mountains, or down in the warm valley within minutes. The seasons are mild, and the overall town atmosphere, while maintaining some California-tourism flair, is ultimately quite genuine.

They failed to mention that Redding is the last warm part of the Central Valley, with temperatures reaching 110 – 117 each summer. When your feet leave tracks in asphalt – it’s hot.

So’s the fishing.

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"Its almost pushing the limit of how much light can be absorbed into one material"

The middle dot is mighty darkNanoscience to the rescue with line flash a thing of the past, and night fishing about to get a boost.

Scientists have leveraged carbon nanotubes to make the blackest black, almost 30 times darker than the current standard.  Light absorption would be a useful tool to cut line flash, it’d be the Stealth Fighter of fly lines.

Black is also the most visible color in deep water, as each wavelength of light is successively filtered out as depth increases; the “hot” colors are the first to go, leaving the darkest colors the most distinct silhouette. At depth, a “blacker” black would actually be more visible than any other color in the spectrum.

I was hoping the Stealth “radar absorbing” paint would be commercially available – now I’m thinking of mixing the two to make the ultimate fishing muscle car, you can’t clock me on radar, and once I kill the lights I’m invisible. Limits my driving to nighttime but that frees days for more fishing.

If you want me to pat you on the Arse, then the suffering had better be commensurate

It’s like hiring someone else to do your fighting for youI like the idea, but it smacks of a “gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today” ecological balance. It’s nice that these issues are slowly being acknowledged, but passing the burden to someone else isn’t deprivation, it’s just making the minimum payment on a credit card.

I’m not an ecology zealot, I still have to drive somewhere to fish and I don’t  blink at the consequences, but if I did, the suffering must be immediate to be rewarded.

The way I see it, there are no points scored for extincting a couple dozen species then feeling bad about it, you don’t wait until they’re all gone to change, if you’re sincere about the issue you have to endure hardship, as anything else is lip service.

So, to offset the effect of the fishing tournament on global warming, its promoters are buying carbon mitigation credits. Previously, after calculating the carbon footprint of the annual Gator-Seminole football game, NWF sponsored the planting of 158 acres of trees that will take 10 years to offset that one game’s carbon output.

On a humorous note, I wonder whether them scientists calculated for the obligatory “jawbone” session post-contest. If you’ve endured a group of anglers reciting feats of prowess, you’ll realize there’s more carbon released in the parking lot than the entire sailfish fleet at full throttle.

Maybe that’s the penance we’re seeking, the immediate carbon payback needed to cleanse ourselves of guilt, us fishermen have to tell the truth – the planet depends on it.

Goddamn scary thought…

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The Before and After – The Rise of the Big Muddy

Sleepy and Pastoral

The “Little Stinking” in it’s August benevolence, quiet, peaceful, scenic, and odiferous.

Swollen and unmanagable, damn near the same color

The “Big Muddy” from the same vantage point, 6″ of rain later. The color is damn near the same, so I’ll be fishing it by lunch today – via jetboat..

As both photos were taken from the same spot, it looks like about a 3 foot increase in flows. I make it 10 extra turns of lead wire, or a 4mm tungsten bead should do it…