Category Archives: current events

Jobs versus jobs may motivate more voters

Truthout While California’s salmon woes are well documented, the TruthOut blog suggests the Governor is misrepresenting the issue, suggesting an attempt to morph the issue into a “fish or jobs” conundrum.

This is not an issue of “fish versus people versus fish,” nor “fish versus jobs.” The battle to save the Delta, the largest estuary on the West Coast of the Americas, really comes down to a conflict between a future based on sustainable fishing, farming and recreation or a future based on corporate agribusiness irrigating toxic, drainage-impaired land that should never have been farmed at the expense of Delta and Sacramento Valley farms and healthy fisheries.

That music to angler’s ears of course, but since fish can’t vote its been pointless to argue the merits of a vibrant and sustainable fishery. 300 million dollars in federal relief for west coast salmon fisherman suggests it’s a “jobs versus jobs” struggle – with the only question being which to preserve, farmers or the recreational kind.

The highest amounts of sales generated by the commercial fishing industry were in California ($9.8 billion)..

The value for all the crops grown in California was $4.19 billion. Do the math, people.

Add in the $1.9 billion in tackle sales and the 23000 jobs associated with those purchases and the story starts getting lopsided.

Is the cost of destroying the thousands of jobs provided to the economy by California and Oregon fisheries, the tourist industry, and Delta and Sacramento Valley farms worth providing subsidized water to corporate agribusiness to irrigate toxic, drainage-impaired land on the west side of the San Joaquin Valley?

I’d take the time to read the piece – the only statistic it’s lacking is the number of jobs tied to keeping all those palatial lawns green with our precious water …

If we’re lucky wading shoes will never be the same

d3o_gel It’s one of those advances in science you know you’ll be wearing shortly, the real question lies in what fly tackle will sport it first.

A gel that when struck turns into a solid, and while snowboarders and other extremist sports are already looking at products, will it be the next great advance in rod science?

Vibration or shock causes the gel to stiffen, so when you initiate the double haul will your seven weight increase its resistance to give you that extra 20 feet of distance?

More importantly, if you slap the butt of the rod, can you impale the SOB that waded too close, rinse the blood off – then act innocent while they search for the murder weapon?

I can see advantages to practice rods, training the wielder to use less force and more timing, and outerwear is already available for cushioning the shock of a fall, but it’d sure be nice to trickle a little into the end of a hollow rod and not have it shatter when we sat on it.

Wading shoes have always been miserable at ankle protection, especially when our feet slip underwater. I can see an immediate application for a light weight shoe with a d3o barrier surrounding the upper foot and ankle area.

Considering it’s good enough to stop bullets, shouldn’t my new $1000 fly rod have this as an insurance policy?

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Despite the cost of hackle, dry fly purism might be on the rise

You want light or lead meat? Illinois is about to follow Wisconsin in adoption of the Lead Sinker Act (SB1269). Having seen little mention of the proceedings in angling print, I’m wondering whether folks have read the detail.

Ingestion of lead pellets from hunting first surfaced the issue many years ago, most states have some form of restriction on their use around wetlands.

The Lead Sinker Act bans the use of lead sinkers and lead head jigs in all freshwater impoundments. It’s the definition of “jig” and “sinker” that neatly covers flies as well:

“Lead jig” means any lead weighted fishing hook that
measures less than 1.5 inches along its longest axis and that
contains one ounce of lead or less.

“Lead sinker” means any device that is designed to be
attached to fishing line for the purpose of sinking the line,
and that contains one ounce of lead or less.

Nymphs weighted with lead wire fall into both categories. Despite that giant black stonefly being greater than 1.5″ it’s still attached for the purpose of sinking your line.

Or is it?

A sinking line is attached to your reel for the purpose of sinking anything attached. If the fly’s weighted too – is this a “Chicken and Egg” issue?

Unfortunately the legal profession is not to be trusted as they’ve bigger fish to fry, evidenced by the discussion on the copyright infringement suit of the lighted fishing rod. The vendor sued another manufacturer who dared illuminate the tip of his rod, and while all the lawyers had to weigh in on the real meaning, it’s obvious few, if any, were fishermen.

The “pole” blatantly includes anything that could be called a “pole” and is certainly different from the “rod”. Just like you saying the pole includes the reel shows off the fact that the pole includes the ENTIRE fishing pole, including reel, and handle, and any other little attachments (see light bulb).

I’m glad we got that straight, because based on the patent attorney’s claim above, fly poles are different than fly rods, and that fly must be an addition to the pole, therefore it’s purpose is to sink the rod, not the line, so they’re legal?

They might convince me to sign up for the inevitable class action suit, but I won’t be initiating it.

Now that we’re all horribly confused, it’s time to stock up on tungsten beads and solder. “Lead free” solder retails around $50 per pound, and  is available in comparable sizes; 0.015″ (around 1 AMP), 0.020″ (2 AMP) and larger.

Just a sign of the times, you can bet similar legislation is enroute to your state soon. While angling vendors have replaced split shot with tin and other compounds, both proportions and structural integrity of flies will be resistant to materials that are sized differently, not to mention the poor fly vendors that’ll have to market the antimony variant to the states with special regulations.

If you’re ordering your flies online, caveat emptor – the penalty is up to six months license suspension, and $1000 per day fine.

… and don’t get too attached to tungsten. We’ve a similar issue with ingested Tungsten, although most of the studies to date were delivered intravenously. Heavy metal is just that, they’re all bad.

Acute tungsten intoxication results in death from respiratory paralysis , preceded by nervous prostration , diarrhea, and coma. The most frequently observed sign of chronic intoxication is poor growth …

The fish get smaller, then they die. Just what we’re looking for …

Fair and Unbalanced, the ascendancy of Brownline Journalism

Most Grammatical Mistakes in a Single Sentence 40 Rivers to Freedom just announced the winners of his prestigious 2009 Fly Fishing Blog Awards – normally a source of great angst and suffering among us callow journalism types.

We were stunned to find the Trout Underground Writer’s Network took home three “Floggers.”

Trout Underground, the 800 pound gorilla of temperance and snark took a rare second fiddle to us boorish Brownliners – who took home the “There’s no real Journalism Allowed on Fly Fishing Blogs” and the Best Blog of 2009 awards.

(Tom, it takes more than a case of Scotch and the promise of Moonpies to take the overall title, the field is now crowded with talented blog authors. Think Jungle Cock, small denominations from non consecutive birds..)

I showed for the ceremony in a stunning strapless, V-cut Simm’s shorty, but Alex and the staff at Hatches Magazine suggested that formal attire wasn’t consistent with family programming.

I did have the chance to chat with the Judges, a rare opportunity to inquire of their scoring methodology. Naturally, I assumed real investigative journalism coupled with outstanding content had carried the day …

Naw, your posts aren’t funny, but the misspellings and bad punctuation are a hoot! In fact, the local English professor is writing a treatise on your apostrophe use, it’s fresh, complex, and usually wrong …

W’ell take it.

I’d like to thank Mom and Dad, and Timmy – the guy that I cut English class with in High School ..

When reality is stranger than fiction

Fortified with Mayfly guts Can my sense of humor be masking a sixth sense? I conjure something out of the blue attempting to get a giggle, and the following week I find it on sale at the grocery store?

Spooky.

Many years ago fly fishing was turned on its ear when Jim Teeny patented his Teeny Nymph. This was pre-Internet so the steam and venom was limited to snail mail.

I can’t wait to see your reaction to the big ® blazed on the side of your next salmon, and while it’ll be easier than eyeballing whether a fin has been clipped, the bigger question is do you have to give it back?

… not release it, return the corpse to its rightful owner.

The tale starts with a genetically engineered hybrid of the Atlantic salmon paired with a Pacific Chinook salmon, gaining weight twice as fast as either species – yet doesn’t get any bigger.

“If a year-old unmodified salmon weighs 70 or 100 grams (1/4 pound), then a year-old (modified) salmon would weigh a kilogram (2.2 pounds) or slightly over,” he said, adding that the fully grown genetically modified fish doesn’t end up larger than the natural fish.”

They call it the AquaAdvantage® Advanced Hybrid, we’ll call it the “Double Chin.”

AquAdvantage Growth Chart

Figure you’re the same height in High School as today, any difference in weight suggests your “breadth” has increased. I’d say it’s the dawn of a new era in salmon fishing and flies.

Gone are the rare tropical plumage and feathers from endangered species, replaced with synthetics we’ll dip in Tempura batter.

We won’t have to worry about escapees – males never ask directions, they’ll simply mill endlessly at the mouth of the Panama Canal, while the females try to leap the lock gates.

The down side is they won’t expire like Pacific salmon, so this’ll be a yearly tourist spectacle complete with vendors selling bread slices for your kids to throw.

No wait, there’s more!

Trout are next.

Despite having to retrofit all the trucks with larger nozzles it’ll be every hatchery manager’s dream, docile 10″ fish that weigh 2 lbs. With that much bulk it won’t be able to swim upstream, it’ll drift with the current waiting for the Cheetos emergence.

It’s an elegant solution, plant them in the upper river and when they hit the brackish delta they’ll expire en masse, and if any make it to the pumps they can scent the lawns in the south end of the state.

Food and fertilizer in one flabby silver parcel.

Government intervention is fashionable, but rarely effective

Chinook in flight Government intervention is a popular topic in all circles of late, especially finance. Most have lost faith that governments are capable of managing anything unless some foreign army is landing on a nearby beach, and then we cheer loudly as the feds show in force.

British Columbia is responding to the threat to salmon stocks in a manner that bears close examination, as it may be one of the few examples I’ve seen of forward thinking…

BC has the double issue of a large and entrenched salmon farming industry, which has had a rocky relationship with locals for all the obvious reasons, but it also has some of the few remaining pristine stocks of wild fish, not yet mown under by development and pollution.

To balance the needs of both, the suggestion is the creation of a salmon agency with jurisdiction over all the causal agents that threaten salmon – from logging and global warming, to hatcheries and farmed fish.

The forum recommended B.C. create a water and land agency by 2012 to oversee the cumulative impact on salmon habitat of all resource activities, from traditional sectors such as logging and mining to modern threats such as run-of-the-river hydro projects. Government progress would be subject to independent, open audits.

It’s a “cradle to grave” approach that sounds like a sensible and thoughtful plan – given that threats to wild fish are many and varied. What teeth they’ll have to enforce will determine success, but it’s certainly a holistic approach that could prove better than crapping millions of fry in a dead river and calling it reborn.

Multiple jurisdictions from traditional agencies guarantee painfully slow progress on any issue, often measured in years or decades. I’d think having all of that under an umbrella agency would allow them to respond quickly to issues at a minimum.

With the miserable environmental record of my state as backdrop, I’ll keep my fingers crossed that while Arnold won’t be back, his replacement might have a model to jumpstart our failed salmon management efforts.

Are we headed back to the wallet based model

“I’ve even had an angler tell me that those who fish and dogs are the only two who need to wear a license around their neck.”

I’ve been “collared” for the last couple of years and haven’t had much issue, but a California Sportfishing group is apparently taking the Department of Fish and Game to task over the requirement that your California license be in plain view.

Easy to spot who's not wearing one I admit that the license clashes garishly with my Pith helmet and red suspenders – but the lack of fashionista lounging in brown water allows me to skulk from bush to bush without incurring a social faux pas.

Maybe if I owned “six pack” abs – instead of carrying all them cans, I’d complain more.

Mine is clipped onto the fishing vest which makes it easy to remember, but I suppose the casual salt water crowd has to remember to attach it to something – and if the fishing is slow and the suntan more important, I suppose they’ve an issue.

The McCloud comes to mind. Everytime I’ve clawed my way through brush and undergrowth to the water’s edge – it was to find something missing off the vest. Perhaps I’ll have a chance to complain later this season.

The Armageddon Scenario, you can’t eat an iPhone

That's how we roll It’s part of my duty statement as a computer geek; avoid eye contact with the customer, inhabit darkened alcoves with blinking lights and strange ritual, and finger all the donuts before selecting the one you’re going to eat …

Most claim I don’t fit the mold, a little too outgoing, a bit of rational speech in between acronyms, and I have outside interests beyond warming silicon and confusing users.

It’s still my responsibility to scare snot out of them on a regular basis. I see them growing restive and am required to restore their “I’d rather be at the Dentist” fidget.

The lunchroom discussion was, “buy gold.” Gold being the best hedge against whatever the economy has in store – and all the nouveau investors were regurgitating their best survivalist schemes – largely based on their VISA card still working. Some wanted to buy the gold ETF (exchange traded fund) GLD, others wanted to go buy some coins and salt them away in the mattress.

I listened respectfully while each newly anointed financial whizkid said his piece, then cleared my throat loudly, ” … screw that, I’m buying guns.”

Now that I had everyone’s attention, some sallow fellow hiding in the shadows asks, “why’s that?”

“Simple,” I says, “in an Armageddon scenario, the bank will be on fire so’s your safe deposit box is unavailable, the NYSE will be shut down and you’ll be holding lots of worthless paper saying you own gold – only you’re not sure who’s holding it for you and where, and now that I know which of you has it at home, me and mine will visit, relieving you of that responsibility as well as the bulk of your canned goods.”

“What are you going to do, throw a mouse at me?”

Us outdoors types have always held the Armageddon scenario in great respect. We’ve got Coleman stoves, sleeping bags, fishing tackle, the occasional firearm – and know which end of the match to light to warm ourselves.

While the financial folks gash themselves about declining graphs, we know that if it gets really bad, we’re surviving. The kids might have to get used to a dirt floor and video games drawn on a steamed window – but we can put vittles on the table and keep body and soul together.

A transient man has been arrested for fishing illegally in San Luis Obispo. 23 year old Victor Silva was arrested Sunday evening at five o’clock for fishing in the San Luis Obispo Creek near the Elk Lane Bridge. Silva was one of a group of transient men camped out by the creek. The Tribune reports that he admitted to wildlife officials that he was the one that caught the fish. In turn, Silva has been convicted of poaching a federally protected steelhead trout. While he was not charged with federal violations, he was prosecuted for breaking state Fish and Games rules. Silva will spend ten days in County Jail.

There’s a thousand wrongs in the above, too numerous to mention – and on every possible level. It throws considerable dirt on the survivalist angle; despite our knowing which mushroom is safe to eat, which bark makes a palatable coffee substitute, and how to construct a compass with leaf, needle, and capful of water …

… the warden is likely to take an interest in the gut pile out back.

I’d make sure you saw the courthouse burning before cooking the neighbor’s Dalmatian.

The fishing will be superb, just knowing the rest of you can’t

A brief public service message from your pals at Singlebarbed.

Set the rod down and back away slowlySaturday you must pay dues, you must grovel and endure hideous ritual, you must utter filthy words foreign to your vocabulary, and must prepare your tailbone for the obligatory Tom Hanks – Meg Ryan marathon.

More importantly you must not fish, because on the 364th day, She rested, and so must you.

You’ll be skulking through darkened streets hoping your buddies don’t see you hand in hand with the Missus.

They’ll be in line behind you at the Romantic Comedy Cineplex scanning the periphery for their buddies – and you’ll have a “Bro-mance” moment when you collide at the popcorn queue.

Sunday you can laugh at the other fellow’s stories – claiming all you had to do was split a diet coke and shake her hand. We know better, but aren’t about to rat you out – not with the crowd listening.

Me? After a long stint in the dentist’s chair fixing all those old fillings from my youth, and with the Doc scoring a “personal best” of 13 fingers in my gob at once, I’ve got enough Novocain residue in my face to feel invulnerable. I’ll be dodging bullets on the Holy Water – and if the reports sound familiar, I’ll pay them no mind, she couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with a scoop shovel.

.. and the 46% of you that forgot what Saturday was – no need to thank me ..

All Hail the coming of his Flaccid Porcine Awesomeness

Suck her down, Bro Terms like “girth”, “chunky” and “football”, sprayed at large fish by those lucky enough to have hooked an uncommon specimen. The rest of us nod, recognizing the use of reserved fishing superlatives.

So what are we going to call the exceptional blended farm-raised-wild strain of salmon?

Tom Gill of Dalhousie University told The Chronicle-Herald newspaper in Halifax said producers complaining to him about the texture of their farmed fish can blame themselves for adding fish oil to the salmon feed to increase their weight.

Some ponderous lard body rolls on your fly, giving you a brief and lethargic dead-weight squeal to your drag, then points itself at your feet and gasps in long sobbing wheezes, while drooling all over your shoe.

“So you can fatten the fish up and make them heavy in a hurry by feeding them a high-fat diet, but it gives you a really sloppy sort of soft texture,” he said. “If you’re feeding them a high-fat diet, it’s like feeding an individual on a diet of peanuts and potato chips only — of course they get flabby and soft, and that’s what happens to the fish.”

I’m thinking that this has to turn the angling world upside down. Noble Salmon reduced to crack-whore status, spurned by legions of former aficionado’s, and loved only by the Malibu physician administering celebrity facials. 

A “fatbody” isn’t getting up for the morning bite, it’ll be napping by midday, and will skip dusk in favor of the all night drive thru – where it won’t have to display it’s sickly, pale flesh to the gaze of bystanders.

In the latest incident, at the end of last week, 30,000 maturing 2.5kg (5.5lb) fish escaped from their cage in West Loch Roag, off the coast of Lewis, after a seal attack.

The escape, which was detected four days ago, comes at a time when wild salmon are approaching the rivers to spawn, meaning that there could be intermingling and genetic dilution of the wild fish. These are extremely fit creatures, swimming thousands of miles across oceans, then battling their way upstream.

If they spawn with the flabby, cage-reared fish, it is claimed that the offspring can be genetically weak and the wild salmon population, which is recovering after some very bad years, could be threatened.

The Association of Salmon Fishery Boards and the Rivers and Fisheries Trusts of Scotland are now preparing a formal complaint to the European Commission.

In the states, we’ve always asserted that “wild fish” were superior in every respect to their hatchery counterparts, but will that remain true? Hatchery fish have to make the same journey as a wild fish, imparting some common sense and muscle tone, with the addition of a flabby panting farm fish in the watershed – will we have a new respect for its pen reared migratory cousin?

… and will we invent new terms of endearment and prowess? “Half Pounders” refer to returning small steelhead, will we call the smaller farm fish a “quarter pounder with fleas?”

Will the “honor roll” of distinguished names; King, Chinook, Pink, Dog, Chum, and Silver, be augmented with the Butterball and Acne variants?

“I prefer the Butterball, less stretch marks on the fillet, and the timer pops out when it’s done.” 

Go ahead and giggle, a couple seasons from now that could be you talking.