Category Archives: commentary

It’s Old School economics, and it’s never wrong

The BeFi Indicator, it's never wrong With the government tinkering with all the numbers, and the nightly news assaulting you with economic hardship typified by gas prices, foreclosures, and the decline of the US dollar, us fly fishermen are left in a quandary, is now the right time to buy a rod?

Us brown water specialists have lots of time to ponder on the really weighty issues, it’s the price of solitude – as the rest of you elitist sumbitches conspicuous consumers insists we fish downwind of everyone else.

The short answer is “NO”, now is not the time to be spending precious dollars on a luxury item, as according to the Brownline Economic Financial Indicator (BeFi, or “Beefy”) we’re in for an extended period of financial hardship.

Candy maker Hershey Co said on Friday it was raising U.S. prices by roughly 10 percent and warned that the higher cost of ingredients such as cocoa, corn sweetener, sugar and peanuts would weigh on profits.

The price of a Hershey’s with Almonds has predicted the ups and downs of the stock market with uncanny accuracy, and while the well coifed “suits” foaming from the safety of your television insist the Market is near a bottom, don’t believe it.

A 10% increase in the “Beefy”, means we’re at least 20 months from stability, and you’ll need that cash to pay for important staples like Whiting Saddles and fly floatant.

Nebraska’s 20 year plan for Hunter and Angler recruitment

Angling for recruits You’re a herd animal, and if you lose your fishing pals you’ll give up the sport entirely.

Can’t say I blame you much as most of my fishing is solo, it takes a special dementia to walk 3-4 miles back to the car in the dark, or wade risky water without anyone knowing your whereabouts.

Nebraska has published some of their plans for retention and recruitment of their hunters and anglers, and the above is just one of their findings.

If you’re enamored of fishing for more than one species, you’ll remain an angler longer and generate additional fees for the state’s coffers.

I say, “Welcome to the Brownline” – as it wouldn’t surprise me to see  emphasis on trophy warm water fisheries; migratory fish are in decline worldwide, there’s no more pristine water for fancy trout “farms”, and warm water fish are hardy, plentiful, and close to home.

Makes you wonder what would happen if they applied the traditional “single barbless catch and release only” restriction to a Largemouth fishery – and whether you’d allow your kids near the water’s edge …

If hunting and fishing are to increase in popularity,
public support is critical. Education and marketing
programs that portray the hunter and angler as the law
abiding citizens they are have not been effective. One
study by Responsive Management in 2003 suggested
the majority of our public still feels that most hunters
knowingly violate hunting laws and over one third of
Americans feel that “a lot” of anglers consciously violate
fishing laws.

… you’re also a poacher, which isn’t much of a sin considering the number of Jack Rabbits and Deer taken during “Steel Belted Radial” season.

All the states are struggling with the same phenomenon, the gradual gentrification of society and the slow erosion of the outdoor skill set, mostly because the outdoors is vanishing as well.

Findings like this will be watched carefully by the other 49 states, and it shouldn’t surprise us to see some commonality in their approach – especially if any are successful.

I’m getting fitted for my white hat

We may be the good guys for once I’m not so sure we’re not the good guys.

We travel great distances, spend gobs of cash, and when we’re lucky enough to outwit a fish, we don’t belittle it, make a guppy face, or give it the finger.

We slide it into the water or the fry pan as painlessly as possible. Some regard us as eccentric, some think us cruel, but all of us can agree that despite the quarry – there’s a hint of respect in all this.

Them other folks, the non fishers they’ve got some ‘splaining to do:

I’m thinking the moral high ground is ours for a change, and uncomfortable as it feels, bask in it while you can…

Every so often a really good idea isn’t

Sacred hour, the last 60 minutes before dark I see it as using turn signals in the city, all you’re really doing is giving information to the enemy…

Picture that rarified hour before dark, the lake is a sheet of glass, the fish are feeding in earnest, and tippet looks like winch cable on the surface. It’s “perfect” time, in 60 minutes either your execution is perfect, or you’re perfectly frustrated, it’s the only possible outcomes.

I’m focused on willing my 6X to be 9X, and someone to my right starts speaking:

“Yea, and remember my idiot sister with the cleft palate, well she married that loser dude you met. Yep, the short guy with the nose ring, that’s the one.”

Incredulous would be the operative word, some fellow 300 yards distant appears to have a two way radio glued to his ear, chatting with a buddy in a float tube. Conversational tones carry at least a half mile, and he’s emptying the family closet for the entire lake to hear.

“%$#*, I missed one.”

At this point, assorted Mom’s are hustling kids away from the shoreline, and I’m wondering whether my destiny will be, “%$#@, the fat guy next to me caught another ^%$# fish.”

Technology is a wonderful thing … at times. It holds much promise, but like the Atom Bomb, not everyone that can afford it should own one.

The running diatribe pauses long enough for me restore “last hour’s bliss” and I managed to fool a nice rainbow with a Pheasant tail. Sliding the fish back into the water the silence is punctuated with more blathering:

“Naw, I’m using a dry, I’ve never caught %$#& with Pheasant Tails, that what you’re using? &%@#, I missed another one.”

Well that confirms everything they’ve said about distracted drivers talking on cell phones, my discomfort is fading a bit with each announced muff – it’s irritating, but Loudmouth has his pants around his ankles for the amusement of all within earshot.

“OBAMA? %@*& him, I can’t believe you buy into that liberal &^%#*, Jesus.”

I can’t help you pal, once religion and politics dominate the conversation, you’re on your own.

… Hell, I can’t see my tippet anyways, time to call it a night.

We forgot the Conestoga when we started drinking Calistoga

Roughing It I’d like to call it wisdom, but that small voice from the Eternal Child Within suggests it ain’t smarts, it’s unwelcome gentrification.

Prior to age 30 a weekend fishing trip was a buddy calling Friday night with a twenty burning a hole in his pockets, a pack of bologna, and a blanket. As long as you had the cash to match his tank of gas, the details fell into place when the creek came into view.

As daylight turned to darkness, the absence of proper planning meant, “You didn’t bring a flashlight? Guess we’re sleeping here.” Meals were spur of the moment, “I got some bread, some moist toilettes, and … SWEET, Tic Tac’s …”

Years later, my coworkers and I are headed up to Manzanita Lake for the weekend, and the water cooler conversation sounds like the antithesis of all we held sacred…

“You aren’t bringing a tent? You ain’t sleeping with me!”

Nope, as compelling as your narrow arse is in the moonlight, I thought I’d just toss in a tarp and a bag and call it good.

“There better be showers at the campground. You think they have showers there?”

You’re going to be arse deep in water all day, you think bathing will be that much of an issue, and if so – what about simply going swimming, like Jim Bridger…

OK, so it’ll be steaks Friday night, but what about Saturday night?

We could fight over the bones the bears leave us, or we could break camp and return a day and half early, just before we starve to death.

What do you guys put on your steaks?

Teeth mostly, sometimes fingers.

I’m trying my level best to steer the conversation to the important stuff; ensuring everyone is bringing a rod, someone is packing a float tube pump, which fly shop we’re stopping at so everyone has flies, how old is your tippet, knotted versus knotless, and will “NumbNuts” remember to bring his wading boots this time.

They’re having none of it, good sports, but somewhere between 20 and 50 we lost or gained something. Creature comforts asserted themselves, and invulnerability or spontaneity were lost when old bones touched cold ground, with wood smoke no longer the after shave of choice.

Well, what about Breakfast?

That’s the meal you and Martha Stewart slept through, I call it lunch, which will be the first time my feet touch dry land since dawn broke.

200 words on the appearance of a spoon

The thought was good, the execution a bit sloppyI’m guessing something is in order as Singlebarbed turns “one” today.

Blogging is hellish enough and a niche subject like fly fishing reminds me of a High School English assignment, “write 200 words on the appearance of a spoon.” “Round and shiny” comes easily enough but there’s still 198 more words left and you’re dry.

428 posts in 365 days is a lot of practice. I’d always been taught that writing is like a muscle and must be exercised to keep tone. The slow evolution of stilted, unfriendly prose to labored and ponderous – suggests something’s changing. It appears I require a lot more “reps”  before the “Ghosts of English Teacher’s Past” will stop rattling those chains each night.

Maybe cutting those classes was a bad idea..

1000 valid comments and 4000 attempts to sell you Viagra. I’m not sure whether the fishing fraternity has a problem with tumescence, but the spam ‘bots think you do. This is strictly, “don’t ask, don’t tell” from my perspective, but if you’re interested in offshore Viagra made from Kitty litter and Agent Orange, I’ll send you some links.

The Contest That Was Never Announced

The winner of the Singlebarbed “Contest That was Never Announced” is Singlebarbed reader, San Mateo Joe. SMJ commented about twice as often as other readers, on 40 pieces total, and has earned his choice of 40 dozen trout flies – or a new Orvis T3 9′ #4 rod (with a prominent “R” on the cork), and 20 dozen flies of his choosing.

Knowing he sat on the last one and may have nothing to wave in anger, requires us to assist. It should prove a sturdy backup should his arse get a taste for more graphite. Comments are as rare as 20″ trout, and even bad writing is a lot of work, it’s nice to know someone reads this stuff besides my Mom me.

SMJ, you let me know what’s needed, but you can forget about the #18 married-wing Silver Doctor’s …

My thanks to all of you for enduring the last 12 months of split infinitives, outright made up words, and dangling participles, and I’m looking forward to some serious misspellings, crazed hyphenation, and outright lies next year.

Bare Bear Bayer with me.

Work first, play later, Mr. Wharton

Team USA I thought the biggest challenge for a CEO was making the company profitable, increasing market share, and ensuring their stockholders were rewarded by their investments.

Most of the news coming from Wall Street suggests otherwise, enormous compensation not tied to any real performance metric, declining stock prices and exposure to “Sub Prime” combining to earn them the boot.

In addition to focusing on the really important stuff, we’ve earned their attention via CEOchallenges.com – where the privileged “boy’s club” gets to flex their sporting muscle in the contest of their choosing.

I’m not bitter, just concerned that one of these sweet smelling types will break a fingernail is all …

On behalf of each CEO who registers for this event, 50 percent of net proceeds will be donated to Fly Fishing Team USA, which finished eighth in the 2008 World Championships in New Zealand in March. “For Challenge winners, accompanying Team USA in Scotland is a great opportunity to meet the greatest anglers on the planet as well as make connections for future fishing worldwide,” said Buchner. “Participants can join us for team meals, assist us with charting, team scouting, and fish with team members during unofficial practice sessions.”

I recognize the value of corporate sponsorship and how precious dollars are need to defray the costs to the talented fishermen that earn their berth, but it still gives me the “creeps.”

Having guided a lot of privileged corporate types in the “C-Class”, almost none could cast or tie on their fly without assistance. Team USA likely needs scouts and chart help, but not from a fellow that wakes up at 11:00 AM and insists on gluten-free wheat toast.

I’m guilty of a gross generalization, and am unashamed.

I’m looking for parity is all, you dabble in my beloved sport, distracting my anglers with company logos and gimcracks unrelated to the fishing, I want to run your company for six weekends a year

That is a challenge worthy of your metal, Mr Wharton…

Note: Below is the graph of the stock prices of the larger companies participating in CEO Challenge. 

Going Down, Mr Wharton?

Thankfully they don’t allow CDO’s to participate, some of these companies have tons of those..

It’s not a Kiss and Tell, more like a Curse and Tell

SMJ's Parachute Mayfly Singlebarbed’s Chief Correspondent of Harsh Language and Hard Luck Stories, “San Mateo Joe”, reports back from last week’s Upper Sacramento foray.

Joe tells it better than I ever could:

I had good luck and a good time on the Upper Sac, with one exception: day one, on my first trip down to the river, the dry felt on my wading boots came into contact with some dry pine needles that were covering the rocks, and down on my fat ass I went. I suffered no damage, but the Orvis fly rod I was carrying snapped neatly above the cork. (There’s no “R” on the cork, so Orvis has agreed to repair or replace it, free of charge.) I wasn’t carrying an extra rod, so I peeled a bunch of line off the reel, and after putting the reel into the top of my waders, I managed to do a decent job of covering the river with the long end of the stick. My brother then showed up and lent me his backup rod – a telescoping contraption he usually takes whenever he goes backpacking. I ended up catching lots of fish, all on a parachute mayfly pattern – probably the best evening I’ve ever had on the Upper Sac. 

Singlebarbed shakes up them snooty types

A few days later I headed over to the McCloud with a friend of mine. I’d never been there before, and I must say it’s a beautiful river. We camped at Ah Di Nah, and fished the river below the campground that night. There were large stoneflies everywhere, but I didn’t see any fish coming up for them, so I tied on a size 18 mayfly cripple. Hooked seven, landed four. My buddy who was fishing nymphs got skunked. The next morning we went down to the Nature Conservancy. It was a beautiful day, but tough fishing. I only managed five hookups; two to hand. Both took an ostrich herl soft hackle. My buddy’s a much better nymph fisherman than I am, and proved it by out-fishing me four to one. We checked the log at the end of the day, and most reported getting skunked, so I didn’t feel too bad.

Hope you enjoy the attached photo. The Conservancy looked like it could use a little class.

SMJ's Ostrich Herl Soft Hackle

Proof that Singlebarbed readers are of superior stock, not by birthright – merely ingenuity forged in the cold bosom of Mercury, adversity, and greasy filling station breakfasts. In our book, “SMJ” stands for “Suddenly MacGyver Junior” – but the scorch marks on the surrounding trees suggest his show is for mature audiences, or at least those episodes where he breaks another rod…

Joe was gracious enough to include the flies that worked, that little soft hackle caddis looks like a dandy.

The Elements of Succession, the value of Old Guys

We're all headed this route, one way or another There’s something magical about Old Guys, which is why I enjoy their company so much. I liken it to the baseball pitcher that knows he’s only got 90 pitches in his arm, and treats each without wasted motion, executing the delivery without the frantic movement of youth or temper, merely going about his business as thoroughly as his arm allows.

All of us are going to be one of those fellows at some point, it’s a matter of repetition and understanding – polished by wisdom and a life’s worth of experience.

I call it “Jedi Mastery” – the point in any angler’s career where catching and fishing are synonymous.

Fly tying has it’s own hellish struggle and eventual wisdom, and like fishing you rarely see past your inner demons until you can watch someone whose done it much longer than yourself. It’s frustrating as so much time is spent taming the unruly and expecting the worst, yet watching an older fellow whose materials meld in precise order, the unexpected taken in stride, and the outcome meticulous and preordained.

It’s Jedi Mastery, and after thousands of repetitions you learn you cannot tame an art form, rather it tames you.

A bare hook shank is staring at the abyss, your intentions are good and the execution practiced, only the outcome is in doubt. It’s the final frustrating phase that weeds out the unsteady, as your skills work against you; thinking the fly through a disciplined set of operations and when it doesn’t behave as expected, invoking the Mother of a Thousand Turns of Thread to teach it a lesson.

It’s simpler to watch an Old Guy.

I watched plenty in my youth, surrounded by them at the Golden Gate Angling and Casting Club in San Francisco. The 1960’s were playing out in a last gasp of LSD and Youth Movement, and the 70’s started ugly; Watergate and Heroin littered the park with the incoherent and disenchanted,  and GGACC was a reclusive and sunny venue to commiserate over kids and family stress, a place to sun yourself on a park bench while retelling stories of a quieter time.

The GGACC clubhouse in Golden Gate Park

The presence of the Winston Rod Company on Howard Street, run by Lew Stoner, and interest in accuracy casting, personified by Jimmy Green and Jon Tarantino, begat the Rajeff dynasty. The supporting cast lining the sunny benches was both authoritative and vocal, and young casters like the Rajeff’s were clay forged in rod physics, technique, and old guy tradition.

Steve Rajeff and his brother Tim made “kids” fashionable again – and old codgers redoubled their efforts to mould those with the maturity to watch and listen, rather than talk. They may have thought they were saving a generation, if they could only promote some of the “good kids” the rest of the generation had brood stock…

My dad introduced me to both the casting club and addiction by gifting me with a fly rod on my 16th birthday. I’d take the bus or bike out through the park and linger on the edge of the ponds hoping to stay off the radar of them old codgers on the benches. They were tough old birds, vocal and impatient – and if some kid mangled a cast more than twice – they were grabbing your arm, bending it to impossible positions insisting on immobility, and waiting for the first hint of youthful rebuke.

“Jack” was a intimidating old fellow, big sausage fingers broken and knotted from a lifetime of hard work, voice box removed and a gauze bib covering the cavity in his lower throat. I lived in terror of his gaze, the rolling gait of a sailor, and a snow white shock of hair was your only warning of misdeed – he wasn’t shy about heading in your direction if you mangled more than your fair share.

It was a sacred trust, as the open throat meant his fishing days were done, a single misstep wading and his lungs would fill with water. Casting was the only thing connecting him to his life long passion, and he was determined to makeup for any deficiencies in your genetic material or degree of devotion.

Jon Ray was at the opposite end of the spectrum, a fastidious and pleasant man, detail oriented and enamored of the perfection and refinement of casting. He didn’t fish often, despite managing the Aberchrombie and Fitch angling department, and later the San Francisco Fly Fisherman Ltd. store, the last vestige of Winston Rod Company after they traded South-Of-Market for Montana.

He was the first person I saw that trimmed graphite rods, taking a half inch off the tip or butt section to make the rod cast as it should – it didn’t matter that to the untrained eye it cast just fine – competitive casting was inches and feet, and shaving weight or refining taper was your only edge. Designer drugs and blood doping would come later to the Sporting Fraternity, in the past  only physics and artistry determined winners.

I never found out if it was Phil Miravalle or Jon that figured out to spool Amnesia onto a ten-speed rim, but watching the shooting head distance event always started with some out of town fellow unsnarling running line and the GGACC fellows looking either innocent or surprised, knowing they’d confounded the physics of it all.

Jon had a frail back and eventually had everything fused, preventing him from doing much of anything.

Old Guys and frailty are hand in hand, and I’m not sure whether it’s the mortality that makes a fellow receptive to passing on more than advice, or merely they’ve learned not to race us younger dimwits anymore.

In the last month I’ve acquainted myself with a new crowd of tough old birds, Shad chasers – fellows that cruise the American River river accesses looking for fish. Migratory fish and “crack of dawn” they’ll leave to young bucks, mortality and comfort takes a certain amount of visible fish to pry these fellows from the warmth of the truck.

Like the old guys at the casting club, the real event is to get out and mingle – leaving lawns uncut, petulant children asleep, and throwing enough gear in the back to categorize the outing as a fishing trip. Usually the only thing cast is cold coffee from a thermos cup – as the young fellows trickle back to the car after a morning of proving they’re tougher than the elements.

A friendly smile and welcoming banter, as they’re not racing us anymore – sullen and secretive is left to the young guys who’re are still vying for Alpha male – and the imaginary rep that goes with it.

Somewhere between the two is me, mostly I trudge back from the river under their watchful gaze, but I still listen more than I talk – so there’s a cup of coffee in it for me.

I remember the lessons of my youth, and never know whether the unshaven fellow with the friendly grin owns a rod company, or manages the local fly shop – their demeanor and tackle won’t give them away.

A battered fiberglass fly rod that’s likely caught more fish than I ever will, paired with a 60’s-era Pfleuger Medalist with a silvery patina of use. I’m in it for the camaraderie and the occasional nugget of information; what happened last week and what did it happen on … and these fellows can cite chapter and verse with the last couple of decades thrown in as backdrop.

It’s nice to know that there’s still a place in this sport for advanced age. All outdoor activity is physically strenuous, and once started down the diminishing physical path – there’ll still be a half hearted welcome from the perfumed tarts that follow in our footsteps.

I think that’s why the “Xtreme Fishing” movement is lost on me, some fellow declares himself a singularity by taking a fly rod to Mongolia, but the real stud is the old Mongol that endures the hand-wringing and tears – how blow driers are wasted space, and the Pizza Chopper isn’t coming.

Review – Fool’s Paradise, by John Gierach

Fool's Paradise, by John Gierach While laid up this weekend I had the opportunity to catch up on some of my reading, and John Gierach’s latest tome, “Fool’s Paradise” was at the top of the stack. It was an amusing and light read, something I sorely appreciated while running between bathrooms.

I confess I’ve never read any of his books, not because of anything haughty, just “Old Guy Eyeballs” that are shifting from 20-20 vision to a different prescription every other week. Makes my reading difficult and downright painful at times.

A loose fabrication of short essays about fishing for different species, punctuated with some stellar quotes and humorous anecdotes. It’s a traditional coffee table book, light and airy – neither technical nor taxing, akin to listening to your favorite grandfather recounting stories of his youth.

“I necessarily fear change except that it’s so seldom for the better. It’s just that I can live with any number of things going straight to hell as long as these streams continue to hold up. If this amounts to living in a fool’s paradise, don’t waste your time trying to explain that to the fool.”

It’s plain that Mr. Gierach is “old school” – one foot in the sport of his forefather’s, and the other in “contemporary” fly fishing. The marriage of the two “halves” drives both mirth and reflection on past outings and fish. Absent the technical jargon that plagues angling literature, he’s at ease with his skills and the honest pleasure of fishing dominates his nimble prose.

“I try to stay abreast of broad trends in the sport, but I guess I missed the moment when steelhead flies began to look and sound like sex toys.”

Gear and flies are an afterthought, despite veiled reference to the pleasure of bamboo rods, and he’s quick to point out those aren’t viable for anyone’s budget – despite the recent resurgence of the “cottage” artisans.

The book poses the author against a backdrop of fish species, pals, and odd circumstance. The unique struggles or tribulations to be successful in pursuit of each, punctuated by the humans and fauna that surround them.

“We always seem to be looking for places that aren’t used up yet so we can begin to use them up in our own small, modest way.” 

Time plays a pivotal role in most of the stories, and is met with the same tolerance of the inevitable; time lost, time squandered, and even perfect timing all play a part in every excursion. It’s as if the author wishes to reinforce that “time spent” is more important than all else, and both success and failure can be a worthy memory.

It’s a rare message akin to my own mantra, if it has fins and eats invertebrates there’s a helluva adventure waiting for someone.

“If things are going well and I’m getting out on the water every day, I’m probably getting enough fishing. If not, a fishing book just underscores what I want to be doing but can’t.”

Plenty of infirmity to underscore what I’d rather be doing, but I slurped my soup and let Mr. Gierach blaze the trail for me.

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