Author Archives: KBarton10

A tender release and the Darwinian refusal

After an exhaustive 20 year research effort scientists at the University of Illinois suggest that the vulnerability of being caught is an inheritable trait in Largemouth Bass.

You're showing poor form, but the guy on the far bank gets your point Science like this should stifle them yawns, as it bespeaks of vast changes in your angling habits.

Study anglers were allowed to fish only under a strict reservation system, with all fish logged and tagged over a four year interval. After draining the lake they divided the recovered fish into those that had never been caught and those that had been caught many times.

Isolating the two groups and breeding them over three generations increased the disparity, the “never been caught” group was now even harder to hook, and the vulnerable strain showed a slight increase in their already promiscuous catch rate.

For us bodycount-conscious anglers that suggests we want the catch and release ritual to be stress-free, ensuring the next generation of fish at our “secret spot” are doubly available.

It also suggests that modern vests should have a shoulder holster and special pockets for additional clips of large bore handgun ammo. Treating a caught fish with great tenderness requires us to be equally diligent in the converse, stomping the life out of anything that refuse our flies.

Note: Firing a high velocity round at a shallow angle – especially for “smutting” fish visible to the angler, will result in the far bank getting a fair amount of “skipping” ricochets. Be cognizant of your surroundings, line up both snooty fish and wading anglers – as “conservation minded” includes your ammo as well.

If the cops come don’t use any cheesy psycho lines, tell ’em Darwin told you to do it and they doubly-deserve to die.

These same researchers gave us the model for catch and release fishing, suggesting that the entire ritual take less than four minutes. Advice that Fly Fisherman’s cover-Wookie violated egregiously – as exposed by the ever vigilant Moldy Chum.

An interesting item in their research (on Bonefish) suggested that caught fish take four hours to recover from the ordeal, during that time they’re “woosy” and more susceptible to predators.

… that’s why I have my buddies fish through the hole first – they always think I’m being generous …

Yawn, is that supposed to be .. like .. extreme?

I suppose my life list can be etched on a "sleeve"Like you I’m the recipient of every strange aberration that is loosely connected to fishing. Today some well meaning cubicle denizen sends me a link to body piercing, featuring fish hooks and the traditional, “Dude, check it out!”

Any guide worth his salt would suggest fish hooks and flesh have a natural attraction – with client owning the hook(s) and guide owning the flesh.

… and as I’m poring through the pictures of nutcase’s insisting that meat impaled on hooks is a mixture of Jesu Christo and colonic cleansing – how their Shaman insisted it was the fast track to Oneness, I’m only mildly amused.

With tattooing, branding, and shaped scarring in great demand – what does a fly fisherman stab in his arm to prove he’s worthy – and will you want to erase the Sage tattoo if you become enamored of G. Loomis?

Just a thought…

My experience with piercing always involves being many miles from civilization with me asking, “did you pinch the barb like I asked, or will I have to operate?”

A good clean “through and through” on an earlobe is a thing of beauty. A combination of precise timing and a gust of wind; are we a tad hasty on the removal, and with most of the urbane sophisticates sporting the simple “pirate” hoop or stud, what fashion message is conveyed with a full dress Jock Scott?

It’s like Bruce Lee showing the secrets of the ShaoLin, now someone has to die

Ever wanted to know what it’s like to go fishing with a genuine fly fishing blog author? Wonder why we never mention where we fish – like it’s some great, dark secret?

Nothing could be further from the truth.

We sure talk a helluva game, but when it’s time to show our l33t skills, we mostly look like Miss Kitty above …

OK, I do. The rest of the crowd actually knows stuff.

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Lang’s Auction, the estate of Martin J. Keane

Carrie Stevens streamer, one of many For the auction crowd, Lang’s April 17th auction contains the estate of Martin J. Keane, author of “Classic Rods and Rod Makers.”

Lots of classic bamboo rods available with hoary and rarified names; Young, Leonard, Pre-Fire Leonard, Halstead, Thomas & Thomas. Payne, Winston, F.E. Thomas, Goodwin Granger, Orvis, and Edwards. Reels to match with numerous Hardy, Fin Nor, Vom Hofe, Sage, and Orvis.

Flies by Carrie Stevens, Preston Jennings, Edward Ringwood Hewitt, Syd Glasso, Harry Darbee, Lee Wulff, Charles Defoe, and Poul Jorgensen, as well as many other published masters.

Buttressed by scads of first edition books, ancient catalogs, and (my favorite) hand carved fish decoys.

Add wooden duck decoys by the Ward Brothers, Harry Shourds, a leavening of Mason’s in most grades, and a couple hundred hand carved duck calls, and you’ve got an hour of unfettered desire ahead.

I think Scarface holds the answer to why Salmon are gone

I think “Scarface” holds the key to the entire salmon – steelhead issue, and is the poster child for what ails us…

A Crystal FX leech proved his undoing, which would suggest diminished capacity – as the fly does look appealing, but it in no way rivals a Big Mac.

 Face removal via rocky debris

My interest started with the winter floods, and while I could find little information about what fish did – there was a great deal of research on what bugs do in response to natural calamity.

Take a water district operating with complete autonomy;  no CalTrout, no Trout Unlimited, no passionate enviro-lobby, as there’s little glamour in little brown rivulets, couple that with a week long promise of heavy rain, and you get Scarface and more like him as progeny.

140 CFS is the normal flow, yet for 12 hours during the storm the dam release was 14000 CFS – enough to take the face off what few fish could hide, and blew the rest of the fish into the Delta accompanied by Dodge Escorts and rusty shopping carts.

I’m wandering an empty creek, barren of Bass – and what few fish remain show scrapes, scratches, and assorted wounds compliments of the “Zero Sum” water policy on the lake above.

You’re tired of hearing it, and I’m tired of saying it, “.. rather than spend those precious dollars on restoring the pristine, which we quickly despoil, perhaps we should be focused on restoring the balance of Nature.”

Most drown in their den, the rest are beaver burger In each of the last two years the release from the lake coincided with the wettest storm, suggesting the water district management blew open the gates in response to what runoff was anticipated. Swelling any river 100 times its normal size in an instant makes a killing machine; it destroys the insect population, kills or removes all the fish, and probably wipes a goodly portion of indigenous reptiles, amphibians, and anything else that calls the streambed home.

Both years would have scrubbed the creek at the height of the salmon spawn.

Beavers are great swimmers, but not when the river is a torrent. Likely it kills most in their burrow – and those that make it into the water are battered into pieces. At right is one of three dead beaver encountered at the high water mark. A little far-gone to determine cause of death, but it’s possibly additional evidence of an abusive water policy.

Multiply my little toxic creek by a couple hundred and you can see why there aren’t any salmon or steelhead, and why we’re dependent on the four hatcheries for the homogeneous mix that is shat onto the spillway.

The K-2 of fly tying, a solo ascent on dry fly hackle

It was a comment made by Alex at 40 Rivers to Fish that had me pondering fly tying as a whole. Like all artisans you wake one morning and realize you’ve explored most continents – and wonder is this the pinnacle of the craft, and after years of toil – are there no dragons left to slay?

Two or three hundred years of small hooks and smaller feathers doesn’t leave many Everest’s to climb, and with the few surviving manuscripts of “them as came before”, you never know whether it’s really invention or modification you’re working on.

Most real innovation in fly tying has come from new synthetic materials, rather than technique. Simple items we’ve taken for granted hold a great deal more promise than their older counterparts – and poring over countless synthetic fashion yarns has introduced new worlds for me to conquer.

The Granddaddy of all fly tying mountains has been hackle, and most tiers will admit that the big dollars is invested in their collection of genetic chickens, and the unending desire to accumulate more colors and rarer strains to assist in either floating flies or imitating the terrestrial bug.

So long as that continent remains untamed, there’s plenty of uncharted territory for the tinker tyer.

Despite all the synthetics we’ve grown from test tube, and despite the efforts of thousands of fly tiers attempting to find a substitute, only the Haystack/Comparadun series of Caucci-Natasi has yielded an adequate substitute for hackle. Some may argue that the Swisher-Richards No Hackle was viable – but mallard wings don’t stand up to abuse and once tattered, may be eaten as a caddis emerger versus the fully terrestrial mayfly dun.

Cul Du Canard (CDC) has its legion of followers, but most flies are hybrids – a mixture of CDC and chicken hackle – not the truly hackle-free dry that would free us forever of the genetic chicken.

In response to the larger question, I’d suggest there’s a great deal more real estate for the journeyman fly tyer – but it’s rarified turf, a combination of physical properties and technique, where you’ll have to know the first and invent the other.

I’ve attempted Everest many times, and this year I’ve got working prototypes. Chicken farmers are safe, it’ll take a couple more seasons to figure out the tool I need to tie these blazing fast, but the physical qualities are sound, the materials tough as nails, and all I really need are some hungry and desperate fish to make me feel the effort was warranted.

There’s still plenty of refinement needed in both form and execution, and my Brownline activities don’t offer the ability to test dry fly theory – most hatches are Trico or Caenis and I’m reluctant to fish things I can’t see – hackled or otherwise.

I’ve never seen their likeness anywhere – but that doesn’t mean some canny Victorian fly tyer didn’t get tired of his stringy old roosters and use Red Deer in a similar fashion – the only advantage I have is his work was lost to Time.

Flies float because of combination of surface tension and square footage. Meaning, materials heavier than water can float so long as they occupy enough surface to prevent the fly from sinking. Chicken hackle itself is not lighter than water, neither is the hook, tail, or dubbing.

The hackle above the water provides no flotation, neither does the hackle underwater, so it’s the cross section that occupies enough real estate to resist sinking.

Drop a needle into the water point first and it sinks instantly, lay it on the water lengthwise, carefully, and it’ll float.

The answer to our Everest is to find a substitute material that’ll provide the same cross section as chicken – and if it’s durable and cheap, we’ve got something.

Like the Caucci-Natasi Haystack/Comparadun, I’m exploiting deer hair.

The profile is a parachute dry, which after a couple decades of intensive personal use, I fish more frequently than the traditional Catskill dries popularized over the last century.

The Brownline NoHack, slow water edition 

This is the lightly dressed variant, a Blue Wing Olive in size 16. Dun gray elk hair is tied in as the wing, then bent 180 degrees and flared around the post. Wing length and “hackle” retain traditional proportions. The whip finish is spun around the wing rather than the hook shank, as the wing is the final component of the fly.

I had an idea that I could cut the wing loops and pull down more hackle if the fly was fished in broken water. If it works you’ll be able to adjust the amount of hackle with your nippers.

That and you could sever the wing to make the spinner, leaving a little nub so you can pick it out from all the other naturals in the surface film.

The heavier hackled variant is tied completely differently and is still in the beta phase. I’m hoping to finish a couple dozen for the season Opener, which’ll give me and SMJ something to giggle over while fishing.

 Brownline NoHack PMD freestone flavor

Above is #16 Pale Morning Dun using the “heavier hackle” construction method. I didn’t put too much more hackle on this version, but this style allows me to reduce the wing mass despite the use of more elk hair. Hackle and wing are a single bunch of elk/deer that’s trimmed to produce the final wing shape.

I guess I’d answer 40 River’s comment with something different; you spend a couple decades painfully mastering the craft, and when you look around and see nothing that stimulates you, it’s time to stimulate others, taking the craft one small step past your comfort zone.

For me, the tinkering component is an endless amount of hideous barriers to overcome; chicken hackle a physical obstacle, and angler perception an emotional barrier, both await some fellow not satisfied with a McGinty – and wonders can he make a better bug’s arse with a popsicle stick.

OMFG, it’s less than two weeks away

This is the weekend where you remember Opening Day is only a scant 14 days away. Tomorrow “Momma” is going to wonder why you’re mowing the lawn without her having to ask six times, why you’re suddenly attentive, and why that squeaking laundry room door suddenly claims your undivided attention.

She’ll remember as soon as your behavior changes –  and show her appreciation by leveraging the remaining thirteen days into a year’s worth of chores you failed to complete.

Secretly she’s thrilled you’ll be asking to abandon the family unit for the entire weekend – as she’s tired of your underwear in the sink, tired of your iron grip on the TV remote, and no longer considers your snores from the living room couch musical…

There’s another way to accomplish the same goal … it’s much less strenuous and keeps your dignity intact.

Take Momma, a couple sandwiches and a jug of the Good Grape ..

Here.

 

.. also here.

 

… and here.

Now yank that cork, plunk her on the tailgate, and when she’s got a firm grip on that sandwich – ask “can you have the weekend off” …

No need to thank me.

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We are so far behind the technology curve

I'd pour these SOB's on Ice Cream Can fly tying inspiration come from an unlikely source like mixed drinks and gourmet cooking?

If you’re desperate like me it can.

I spent most of this week tracking down scientific information on Carp feed, mating ritual, natural predators, response to stress, and preferred Ph – and endured the traditional dry dissertation that ensured we slept through Biology class.

Then I stumbled on the really good intel – the kind of information only hardbitten anglers produce, and I’ve been in the kitchen ever since…

After being bested by what many would describe as a “dumb underwater cockroach” – I was resolved to “man-up,”  it’s unsightly for a paunchy, middle aged angler to weep uncontrollably at streamside. It’s also mighty cold to recover a fly rod from deep water – having been thrown in a fit of pure infantile temperament.

Fly fishing can dim your vision after the first couple of decades, reducing the solution set to; dry, emerger, wet, and nymph. My repertoire is now enhanced after reading the Top 10 list of best selling Carp aids,  and neither Peacock herl or Glimmer chenille was mentioned once:

Creamy Pineapple, Double “G” Extreme Ice Cream, Wild Whiskey, Scopex,
Intense Sweetner, Cinnamon Butter Rum, Triple B, Creamy Pineapple Banana, and lastly, Pineapple Ice Cream Flavor

If that’s not inspirational just read the list aloud and see if the Missus doesn’t send you to Baskin-Robbins on the double.

We’ve been so focused on the perceived advances of ultra-extra light graphite, space age fabrics, and titanium – when the reality is we’re still lagging Carp technology. Likely it’s because revolutionary change occurs more frequently when the cost is six bucks, and we’re taking three and half years to pay off each fly rod.

Just think of these as Biodegradable Ultra Light Line – Scent Helpers with Intense Tastes, that … or fly floatant … whichever allays the suspicions of your effete dry fly pals.

Me, I’m adding a little alcohol to the mixture to numb my quarry’s lips; figuring he’ll swallow and digest the fly, and I won’t set hook until it comes out the other end.

These are doubly useful, if the Carp don’t care for the Tutti-Frutti, you can squeeze a dollop into your hydration pack …

Hatches Magazine is looking for the next Theodore Gordon

40 Rivers to Fish and his pals at Hatches Magazine are looking for a few crazed and desperate fishermen who can lie convincingly, or with a straight face, or both.

… and they’re prepared to reward you handsomely for your prose.

Hatches Magazine announces it’s first annual “The Season” Contest!
“The Season” is for anyone who enjoys sharing their fishing stories and pictures with other people. It’s a contest for anyone who keeps a journal, or has wished they would have; chronicling their fishing trips to look back on during the long, cold tying season or 20 years down the road with their grandchildren.

How To Enter
To enter, all you have to do is create a blog on the Hatches Blog Network and start recording your adventures during the 2009 fishing season. Writing a blog is easy. In fact it’s no more difficult than writing a post on an Internet message board. (Persons already part of the Hatches Blog Network are already entered.) You can tell your story through: words and pictures, just words, just pictures, long posts, short posts, whatever- It’s your season, so you can tell your story however you wish! When the snow falls in December, you’ll have a great memoir to read through, reminding you of all your triumphs and lessons learned from the past season on the water.

Only reports and photographs taken between January 1, 2009 and December 31, 2009 are eligible.

Writing a blog is many things but “easy” ain’t one of them. It’s fun, often addictive, sometimes a chore, and always a lot of cursed hard work. As described above, it’s a lot like posting to a message board – only the swear words have to be edited, and for varieties sake – every other post should start with something other than “Dude, your Mom.”

… everything else is just like a forum post, including finding out nobody but you likes that fly and everybody except you knew of that spot already.

You’ll also have the chance to win some excellent prizes…

A panel of judges will award prizes for best photography, writing and the best overall season. In addition, Reader’s Choice Awards will allow the public to vote in a variety of categories. Voting and prize details will be announced as they’re confirmed.

Click Here to Register for a Free Blog

There must be dozens of stalwarts itching to damage English – here’s an opportunity to share your saga while allowing us to live vicariously through your adventures.

Carp worth more per pound than Beluga Caviar?

The science is flawless but the economy might have ramifications for their life expectancy…

A $30,000 pollution sniffing Carp is a miracle of modern robotics, like mine they’re likely to ignore flies, but with the hardship suffered by the global fishing community, what’s preventing a canny angler from upending a 55 gallon drum of fuel oil into the bay, and then running a drift net through its plume?

It's a Somali special UK scientists plan on releasing a half dozen of these finned sniffing machines into the murky waters of Gijon, Spain. If successful we could expect to see the devices deployed in both freshwater and salt.

Each robot fish is armed with autonomous navigation capabilities, allowing them to swim around the port without the need of human intervention. They also can return automatically to a charging station when their batteries run low after about eight hours of use.

Wi-Fi allows the offload of data collected and if your yacht is pumping its bilge at the wrong time, you could earn a visit by the local constabulary.

The movie shows an uncanny swimming motion, perhaps our next trophy venue will include robotic steelhead capable of snapping trees and hawser cable.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYvyiruWzYo[/youtube]

But before you clap with glee, you may want to watch Westworld a second time.