It’s likely to trigger a most difficult chicken and egg debate, considering us fly fishermen can save a trout stream or save a forest, but we can’t do both …

Recent salmon studies suggest “you are what shades your banks” – and if the surrounding forest isn’t healthy, neither is your fish population.

More insidious than Zebra mussels, more cunning than a middle aged divorcee, and while we gash ourselves over saving the outdoors by eschewing filthy felt wading boots and their porous inserts, our woodlands are being overrun by eyeless and slimy creatures that fly fishermen are sworn to defend …

… the lowly earthworm, and we’re all guilty as sin.

Clean, Dry, and Protect all you want, but it was you that drug them little Styrofoam canisters up to the bank and left them there to reproduce unchecked.

Once you learned to fly fish you got all huffy and resentful at the thought and claimed your hands had never touched the Unclean Thing, but the rest of us are claiming ignorance and we know better. First you unleashed hordes of the Big Assed American Nightcrawler, then after despoiling most of the American West, you trained your kids with them effete Eurotrash skinny types from the liquor store cooler.

… we ain’t going to mention the mountains of Powerbait you left in your wake, that would only be piling on …

Penance is possible only if you wad the butt section of your Boron BIIX into the leafy substrate and affix both leads from your car battery. Stomp everything that moves, then Clean, Dry and lament …