There are times when I think fishermen are the only folks allowed to abuse their spouse systematically without fear of legal action.
This morning I approached my gal while she was finishing up the ironing of her work outfit. I gestured at the iron, “Is that hot?” She got that dreamy emotional look, the one that men recognize instinctively – massive emotional points scored and your doghouse days are over.
Flustered and off balance, her voice rising in disbelief, “Yes, you need to iron your shirt?”
I produce a napkin wrapped object and quickly give it a couple of passes with the iron, “Naw, I just wanted to fuse some of these fibers to see whether they make spinner wings.”
I left her sobbing and broken, my crime was getting her hopes up and I am going to pay large tonight.
This post has been selected for The Sacramento Bee’s roundup of regional blogs, which appears Sunday in Forum.
The Sunday newspaper column is limited to less than 800 words. Blog posts included in the column are often cut to fit. No editing is done other than to add ellipses to indicate deleted passages. The blog’s main address will appear in The Bee, and the online copy of the article will contain links to the actual blog post.
If you have questions (or you DON’T want your blog post considered for inclusion in the newspaper column), contact me at jhughes@sacbee.com
John Hughes
P.S. Forum editor Gary Reed, who normally trolls the regional blogs for suitable posts, is on vacation.
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