Guys don’t whine if there’s a gal in the boat

Photo courtesy Dick Blume / The Post-Standard I hear the logic but remain unconvinced. Barriers to coed sports have been breached on many levels, but fly fishing requires us to drop all the advances of the last 100 years and isolate women from men?

I think it’s a farce, led by canny vendors and abetted by guides doing “high five’s” as next week is “the Amazon outing, wo0t…”

Women haven’t embraced fly fishing with any real vengeance, and while inroads have been made in other leisure sports,  I’m thinking part of the problem is their introduction and exposure to our silly notion of segregation.

It’s hard enough to instruct your spouse, but after she’s been mauled by a bunch of louts from the local shop, the memorable part of our sport is the stuff that sucks blood, and stuff that sucks … period.

Women can be vicious wags at the watercooler, their voices grow silent as you approach and animated as you depart. Guys do it too – we’re certainly no saints, but why would we introduce them to a supposedly restful and relaxing sport, when they’re subject to the haughty glare of whichever female clique takes possesion of the lodge and its environs?

Guys go fishing, it’s not “Special Guy Week”, it’s some gaggle of oversexed, overfed, and overbearing fellows, vying to impress others by how long they can go without bathing. Casting classes are not “for Guys Only,” yet somehow the “for Women” label seems to crop up at every opportunity.

I think it’s a setup. A “puppy mill” for hopeful boyfriends, desperate spouses, and avaricious vendors hoping they’ll dump their overstock of claret fishing vests and petite waders.

Guides, shop owners, and lodges don’t clear the decks of males to “ease the learning curve” – nor is their staff suddenly chaste, they’re giggling amongst themselves while the gals endure the presentation attempting to get some “rise” from a participant – and reluctant to acknowledge any “refusal.”

This ain’t a “Lonely Hearts Club” – and most are there at the urging of partners, boyfriends, and husbands. Likely they’d feel a good deal easier if there’s a friendly face to explain some of the technical detail, rather than having to strike up a friendship, and absorb the lesson all at the same time.

I’d want to be there when the instructor mentions her Shakespeare wasn’t as good as my Sage, supposedly the gear was split equitably – and now I’m the callow, gear hogging spouse that’s not to be trusted.

Having taught fly tying for 20 years, women aided the proceedings immeasurably. It keeps the machismo crap to a minimum, and most fellows watched their language – something they never did around kids. The ladies felt welcome – and were catered to politely, never pestered, and made comments that were insightful and welcome. It didn’t matter if they were 13 or 86, they had the same calming effect.

Women are the better novice, guys are too enraptured of the technical detail and reluctant to ask questions and take instruction, as they’ve been taught it’s not masculine to appear helpless. Mixing the sexes at the novice level is a good match – it’s liable to steady both participants; he’d stop whining and she’d have someone to break the current when crossing the deep spots.

Given the choice, I’d rather fish with women. They smell better, are less vain, tell the truth with only minor embellishment, share the fish equitably, and are as gracious in victory as in defeat.

Guys, well … they aspire to that.

I don’t expect some enmasse migration to the Brown water, but I’d expect a steely set to her jaw when I explained the fish wasn’t fit for Man nor beast. It’d be a sharp contrast from her trout loving boyfriend – who’d be dancing around the shallow end hoping I’m there to take the fish off his hook.

9 thoughts on “Guys don’t whine if there’s a gal in the boat

  1. Scott V

    I wish there were more females fly fishing, as a guy I do get a little tired of other males trying to puff their chest out and prove that no matter what I have done or will do, they will do bigger and better. That one fact is why I no longer visit a local fly shop, I got tired of the person behind the counter trying to one up me on everything every time I visited. The few females I have known to fish never and I mean never tried to one better me or someone else. Plus they are nice to look at and theya re calming ot hte spirit.

  2. SMJ

    Go to your favorite search engine and type in “women only learn how to” surf, ski, golf, etc. The courses and clinics that come up may indeed be scams and/or led by canny vendors, but most have an “owned/started/taught by women, for women” mantra of one type or another. Regardless, there’s obviously a demand for segregated learning and instruction, and I suspect there always will be.

  3. Michael

    Given the choice, I’d rather fish with women. They smell better, are less vain, tell the truth with only minor embellishment, share the fish equitably, and are as gracious in victory as in defeat.

    I concur…any time, any place. And they look better in photos too!

    @SMJ – I met a woman just last night who just finished up a multi-day introductory course that included casting instruction (on lawn), entomology, and a day on the water. She was quite excited about the whole thing, and I immediately invited her out. And the folks at the local Orvis shop told me last week that two women came in and filled up the gear bags – head to toe, rods, reels, flies, the works.

    I think this might be a trend. Thank goodness.

  4. KBarton10

    My view is slightly jaundiced, as I had to work a number of these classes, both from the shop perspective and as a guide.

    I always had a good time, just unconvinced this is the best way to introduce a difficult sport.

  5. Jean-Paul Lipton

    I don’t care if you’re a man, woman, or wookie; the barrier to fly fishing is its reputation as an expensive, elitist sport aimed at dry fly fishing to trout, catskill style. Once you can convince people that anyone can be a brownliner with a modestly priced rod combo, you will start seeing more interest in the sport. It’s surprising how many people only think that you can fly fish for trout. Bass, panfish, and pike are gaining popularity, and carp are even worthy of a mention nowadays, but tell someone that you caught a buffalo on an antron nymph, or a pikeminnow on an X-Factor nymph, and you’ve lost them.

    I wonder if the learning curve for casting plays a hindrance to recruiting and retaining new fly anglers?

  6. Michael

    Please don’t flame me 😉 but I think teaching nymphing first is the best way to get beginners onto fly. It’s slow paced, generally requires less casting than dry fly to cover good water, and you don’t have to worry quite so much about relaying the importance of mending. Most beginners can’t recognize fish in a backswirl or find them hovering under a branch either, which makes dry fly a non-starter.

    I’ve started several folks up in the last two years, and they are now feeling a lot more confident and starting to catch photo-worthy fish too. Flip, high stick…and watch that “bobber”. I stress knot tying and water reading for the first couple of trips.

    This weekend they start dipping streamers 🙂 .

  7. SMJ

    Jean-Paul Lipton wrote: “I wonder if the learning curve for casting plays a hindrance to recruiting and retaining new fly anglers?”

    It certainly did for me. It wasn’t until I joined a fly fishing club and went to some of their casting clinics, and bought “Joan Wulff’s Dynamics of Fly Casting,” that I truly started to enjoy the sport. It still took about six months of Sunday mornings beating the lawn in the neighborhood park before I finally felt comfortable fishing with a dry fly.

  8. Anita

    Hey Gents and Ladies of the Fishing Angle,

    It’s nice to know that there is indeed conversation going on about this subject. I think most of us would agree that having a ladies club can and infact is an important and interesting way to benefit the fly fishing community. I’ve had husbands beg me to PLEASE teach their wives how to fly fish or marriage therapy will now have to be included in their financial budget. I’ve had women ask me the same thing. It’s not so much about the guy vs. girl thing as it is about substance vs. style. The reason our Club was started was to address those issues as well as to provide a place of learning in a comfortable environment. It induces us to get away from the spin-cycle of life and develop relationships as well as do some yoga in waders!

    There is so much I have learned from the guys and gals I’ve fish with. It certainly isn’t about exclusion, rather about preparing women to be confident and competent fly fishers on the water.

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