Massachusetts fishermen get Quantitative Easing, the rest of us don’t

fistful_cash To say I’m a little miffed us Californio’s didn’t make the test group is putting it mildly. Us west coasters still bear a chip on the shoulder as Martha’s Vineyard & “Jaws” stole our sharks, and outside of a secretary that didn’t float and her sodden senator boss, always wondered what Massachusetts had to offer that Connecticut didn’t have …

Bygones being bygones, if the federal government decides to test the value of recreational fishing to Massachusetts residents by offering random license holders a cash settlement in lieu of their fishing license, I shouldn’t complain. In short, the NOAA will pay up to $500 hard cash – if you promise not to wet a line the entire year.

… naturally I pondered that formula and realized us anglers have never seen fishing as a profit-driven tool, given how we learned it was a money-sink by the close of our first lesson …

Yet, ponder the concept … Statistically we go fishing nine times a year, and if we figure the costs for; room ($120), food ($65), gas ($120), tippet ($15), and obligatory dozen flies ($24), plus that extra ____ ($150) we bought that the wife doesn’t know about, our season is about $4500 per year.

Instead of that marriage-damaging debt-burden you get a handful of crisp new Benjamin Franklins to make a mortgage payment …

… which by my calculations is a tenfold return on your investment.

I’ll confess the topic had me wondering what my magic number would be, and in light of my jiffo-whip math above, how I might package that into a Pied-Piper pitch reminiscent of Bernie Madoff.  I could jettison the scissor business for financial counseling to bait fishermen, who we’ve always suspected of being weak-minded and therefore impressionable ..

That’s when I realized us Californian’s weren’t ask to participate because our numbers would astronomically high, and adjusted for inflation – and while our real estate might have tanked, our downfall was how our imagined collective self worth was in excess of the Federal Reserve …

3 thoughts on “Massachusetts fishermen get Quantitative Easing, the rest of us don’t

  1. Alan Corbin

    I am in Mass and I don’t think I would cash the check. I have thought about it since recieving the notice, and I have to ask how would they know if I cashed it IF they check your license. The Mass license is purchased online and printed on your computer. I like most people printed a copy of it incase I lose it or inevitably it gets ruined while fishing.
    The money would be great but I tend to think the therapy of fishing is worth more. Although it is only the saltwater license…
    Makes you wonder if they are doing it to see if they can raise the license fees.
    Something is amiss…

  2. KBarton10 Post author

    Alan, thanks for the update – and while most would echo similar sentiments about the health-giving qualities of angling, our spouses might answer differently (unless they’re relieved we’re not underfoot for those nine sacred weekends).

  3. John Peipon

    Now just a Chappy minute!… I, too resemble that post. And I think that I’m glad that I didn’t get invited.
    Nine times a year? Sometimes I get to fish 9 times a week. ( Might be why I need new waders.)
    It also means that fishing’ ain’t catching’. But that’s another story. The whole thing seems misbegotten to me, since sport fishing is right up there with golf, and model airplanes in generating male, hobby or pastime consumer spending.

    See ya at the beach, John

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