Singlebarbed’s role as consciousness for the greater good is simply too much hypocrisy to bear without giggling, yet I’ll wear this ill fitting garment long enough to remind you today is Valentine’s Day, and how most of your season depends on some small courtesy shown Them as Waits at Home …

Scientists agree there aren’t that many fish in the sea, and the Human Race depends on your ability to think outside your own miserable existence and set things right …

Today, all the B-Grade trash bloggers will be featuring acres of taut flesh whose boyfriends are scared of losing them, therefore will be shown courtesy and tokens of esteem. Reminding them how a little leniency regarding; abandonment of home, responsibilities, and children – not to mention coveting bamboo, barbless hooks, or the Out Of Doors, is always repaid with interest …

To hell with hard-bodies, we know all the best gals hate fishing, mostly because we made them so.

Valentine’s Day is like a Full Dress Atlantic Salmon fly. You lack most of the materials and rarely practice their techniques, but recognize that each step builds to a larger chorus, and each mistake, however small, can never be hidden by any subsequent step.

Which, after considerable effort, yields a fly worthy of framing and ensures many pleasant hours afield without fear of the axe handle upon your return.

She has raised your kids and seen the skid marks in your undergarments, it’s time to give the poor lass her due.

A towering bouquet of posies at her work can be augmented with a small card from “Raoul”, or “Esteban”, even better  … “Thor”, mentioning how last night was life altering and how the discarded pieces of her wardrobe have been left with the guard at the front desk  …

She’ll have the card snatched from her grip and will suffer interrogation at the hands of her pals, be forced to reveal every last detail of imagined indiscretion, which will elevate her stature to “bad girl” – the envy of the homebody biddies.

She’ll smile knowingly and claim, “ … why I never, there must be some mistake …” – and you get the next month free to chase steelhead … after you buy her dinner and wince through two seasons of The Bachelor …

… don’t yawn, not .. even .. once.