Now that the World’s collective microscope is off our convexness we can get back to eating all that grease-imbued unhealthy.

No more sermons from “green” zealots admonishing us how unhealthy our kids have become, and no high pitched, pallid scientist illuminating the damage done to the Ozone layer by herds of  Big Mac’s as they graze  peacefully.

Instead we can point fingers at French fast food, which has debuted the Foie Gras Burger, containing acres of duck fat and types of cholesterol that vaporizes arteries on contact, with science gasping for the words to aadequately describe the peril.

As diseased goose liver shares a bit of “snooty” culinary reputation in addition to being a Widowmaker,  the fly fishing community will greet the dripping SOB with open arms, and declare it the Official Burger of Theodore Gordon.

It’s obvious them Eurotrash weren’t content with the “Royal with Cheese” and felt it necessary to one-up us on the societal diabetes scale by adding even more lard.

… and they’re welcome to it. It’ll be percussive Darwinism as us newly svelte American tourists will be side-stepping the disenfranchised Islamic fundamentalists as they rush the cafe entrance with a vest full of nitrates, wherein the slow and fat will eat the blast.

Hamburgers being synonymous with American culture, and with copious references to their care and usage in exported media, we can only hope that  “look at the big ass on Brunhilda”, doesn’t get attributed to Pulp Fiction.

Naturally the Trout Underground will recant their hasty decision to go with a mere chili dog and Cole slaw as their mascot, and it’ll be the subject of much tension on the Drake boards as to proper condiments appropriate for this gelatinous monstrosity.