Take our turn in the docket

I molest underage fish all the time There’s nothing new here. Rich American tourists jetted to exotic third world locale, wined and dined – with native labor herding game towards his lawn chair, iced drink, and high powered rifle.

Well heeled angling is just as comfortable. Remote lodges, private beats, and cold drinks on tap, a rich landscape for the tour company operator intent on catering to every whim – including illicit and titillating.

Now it’s our turn in the docket, with ABC News claiming all us portly monied types are intent on the porn – and it isn’t the fishing kind.

“It will start off with six [young women], then it will be twelve, and then it’ll be eighteen and then you guys will be just retreating. I’m serious.”

Society has always thought the rod and gun crowd had some deep dark secrets, apparently they’ve decided we’re into underage teens – having run out of teachers, swim coaches, and catholic priests to expose.

Another operator told the reporters that he would “make it happen,” when they asked about procuring underage girls for the trip. He said there was an unspoken code on these sorts of tours that no one messes with. The code, apparently, of exploitation.

There’s nothing new here. Some of the Brethren are so afflicted, they’re indistinguishable from the rest of the sweaty crowd at the TU banquet, they backslap heartily and laugh at all the same jokes.

The rest of us are snoring uncomfortably from the darkened bungalows, wishing the guys in #13 would turn the stereo down. After shelling out multiple thousands to visit Patagonia, Venezuela, or someplace with fish more plentiful than home, I’m all for bending a law or two …

… but most are physical laws, like how I can will my sore arm to be twenty again – so I can make just one more cast, or how I can make the mosquito netting an impenetrable fortress with my dwindling supply of Bug Off.

Sure, we’ve got our share of child molesters – no more nor less than any other sporting fraternity or fraternal organization, but the balance of us crossed a couple of time zones to avoid kids and wife – and enjoy that unspoiled pristine.

Tags: Dallas Safari Club, child exploitation, underage teens, fish porn, ABC News, nothing new here, Patagonia, twitchy gun owners

3 thoughts on “Take our turn in the docket

  1. Ray

    Imagine the poor sap who clicks the google link to a blog tagged with “Underage teens” and “Child Exploitation”, and ends up with Singlebarbed.

    Oh well, at least he’ll learn how to die his feathered boa.

  2. kbarton10

    I was gritting my teeth when I wrote it – because I will get a dozen or more hits, possibly more.

    The really disturbing issue is why “insect porn” is asked for so often…

  3. MG

    Oh jeez. Now every guy who books his “trip of a lifetime” at a legitimate lodge is going to get scrutinized by his wife, girlfriend, and/or work colleagues, all because some tour operator (read: useless scalper) had to try impressing his non-existent clientele.

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