Michigan is all over the news of late, largely because of the Supreme Court’s refusal to hear their case against Asian carp, Illinois and the Port of Chicago. Denied a second time yesterday (without explanation) the Court has one last hearing of the “Chicago Diversion” case in April – which many will say is too late.
“It makes sense for the Supreme Court to appoint a special master who’s an expert on this and have them take a look,” Schreck said. “Otherwise, they’re essentially telling six states to take a hike. I don’t think we’ve seen that very often.”
On other fronts, the first stonefly was discovered in the main branch of the Rouge River (also Michigan) – and Friends of the Rouge immediately claimed water quality improvements had borne fruit…
Both Non-Profits and Politicians are notoriously humorless and instead opted for a mixture of handwringing and elation …
I would have declared the Stonefly an invasive species, immediately requesting a tasty slice of the 78 million in “Obamabux” earmarked for the Great Lakes, dropped some cyclone fence into the water connected to car batteries, then blamed Illinois anglers for importing the sumbitch on felt soles …
The citizenry can rest easy knowing there’s no angler in office, as the result would be a couple of gunboats anchored in the harbor and a brigade of Michigan National Guard relieving the lock operators at sword’s point.
Subterfuge is required, which is why I’d suggest sending a couple of Toyota Prius’s screaming into the drink, neatly preventing the lock’s opening – and while the National Transportation and Safety engineers bickered with Toyota – the Great Lakes would be safe.
…for months.
Tags: Toyota Prius, Michigan National Guard, Asian Carp, Supreme Court, stonefly, Obamabux, Chicago Diversion
I liked the Toyota link, but was disappointed when it didn’t end up in the drink!
Your suggesting the dunking of an invasive species, a foreign car manufacturer, as a solution to an American problem. No union will accept this as a productive effort to promote American jobs. Your last blog article clearly demonstrated the superior fish habitat that Chevy has contributed to American lakes and waterways for generations. I would expect our good Republican Senators to censure this suggestion outright. Have a care sir. Hrumph!
If it were my Hybrid that went in the drink, it would be my luck that it would electrocute the last remainders of some endangered tout species, and a Republican Senator, thus ensuring not only a lawsuit but a jail sentence. No fly fishing for you, Johnny!