My reports of the Shad invasion were too much for Igneous Rock (Older Bro) – he responded in characteristic fashion, armed to the teeth with Orange anti-Shad Phaser, Foreign Legion neckwear and big grin as he reached into my fly box for the fourth or fifth helping…

It’s not so much that the Barton menfolk are twisted, it’s more of a California thing – where we export all our idjits to Washington, who via thought or deed make the rest of the lower 48 fear our fun loving nature.

All that comes from the narrow confines of “acceptable behavior” – we can’t point finger and laugh as most of the obvious targets are protected species with powerful political lobbies.

Lump together the creationists, garden variety nutcases, religious sects, comet followers, vegans, pet’s rights, Whale Savers, alternate lifestyles, and the other environmental groups who delight in assaulting us for peeing on a tree trunk, and there isn’t much room for us fishermen to maneuver.

I think the Paparazzi are the worst – they crowd us unmercifully gambling on the upskirt shot as we dismount the vehicle, the unguarded moment where we curse – or hoping our Kashi bar wrapper escapes our damp grasp – befouling the lower river so they can vilify us online and in person (there’s no dead tree’s in their media).

The press of humanity and their oblivious nature ensures we’ll sink a hook into an unguarded limb – suffering through the screams, epithets, and  lawsuit chaser.

Despite the distractions, Igneous managed a sock, a pair of sunglasses – which he landed with assistance, and a Shad – who was likely missing them sunglasses in the first place.