Normally Singlebarbed waits until New Year’s Eve to wax sentimental, a combination of cheap rotgut and a friendly ear gets us out of our antisocial fantasy-world and reminds our pals why they shouldn’t invite us … anywhere.

Some things are just too earth shattering, too horrific to contemplate and will reshape the angling world forever.

Scientists have invented the “Sex Chip” to induce the combined pleasures of eating and the “raw nasty” into the human nervous system.

How is a full dress Jock Scott going to compete with that?

Outside of the entire economy falling to pieces, dwarfing anything seen in the Great Depression, somehow we’ll still want to drive 6 hours and sleep on the cold, hard ground – versus a recliner and taping down the Red Button?

An electronic machine, named the Orgasmatron, taken from the 1973 Woody Allen film Sleeper, is already under development by a North Carolina doctor, who is modifying a spinal cord stimulator to produce pleasure in women.

Lack of spousal sex drive drove many to seek solace in the woods, with Trout merely an available and willing surrogate. Now that “Poppa’s got a brand new bag,” are we fleeing in panic, or completely enraptured?

I see the bottom falling out of the tackle industry – most industries actually, and pioneer outdoorsman replaced by couch potatoes that no longer watch even the NFL.

“In 10 years’ time the range of therapies available will be amazing – we don’t know half the possibilities yet.”

… and you won’t if you hit that red button one more time …