Like it or no it’s an election year and the current regime feels obligated to safeguard the economy until December, so’s they can blame whatever party takes power shortly thereafter.

It’s a time-honored tradition, and with $600 bucks hurtling your way – coupled with your patriotic duty to blow it in an orgy of consumption, we ask – which flyrod are you gonna buy?

Yes, I’m talking to you, no need to glance around panic stricken..

The commandments are simple; you’re not allowed to bank it, you can’t pay off your mortgage with it, and you’re Al-Qaeda if you contemplate anything like paying down your credit card balance. It’s $600 and anything short of a consumer frenzy is simply unacceptable.

It’s 270 flies (with tax) which should represent a full season for most fishermen, except me, as the Little Stinking is a preserve for Charles Schultz’s “deadly kiting eating trees” and their offspring, the “deadly fly eating low hanging scrub” – even then, 270 flies is most of a weekend.

It’s one reel and extra spool, so long as you covet one of the large arbor “economy stimulating hand tooled aircraft grade something-or-other” – you’ll still have to pop for the fish graphic abstract, but we’ll call you a “super patriot” and can quail hunt with Dick Cheney if you opt for the any of the custom finishes.

It’s most of a flyrod actually, you may be able to get a whole one if you order it off the Internet, but that would raise the “commie” issue as you avoided sales tax entirely. You’d still get to meet Dick, but your cell phone calls will be taped for posterity.

What’s plain to me is that none of us will qualify, because even knowing about this gear means you make far too much money already.

… and that’s an ugly thought – that last rod purchase made us miss the mortgage payment, and we’re the cause of the entire debacle?

Say it ain’t so…

Technorati Tags: economic stimulus, Dick Cheney, orgy of consumption, super patriot