Research at the University of Cincinnati is looking into “green” LED’s, specifically brighter colors enabled by Salmon sperm.

The military is well known for ponderous and pedantic “educational” films, the thought of a school of salmon being lashed into chairs to watch a venereal disease video leaps to mind – but as the US Air Force is funding the research, collection methodology is under a strict “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” policy. 

Thank God for that.

“The answer was salmon sperm. Why that? Because it’s considered a waste product of the fishing industry, and discarded by the ton.“

While LED’s are the first practical use of this research, the goal appears to be creating a “liquid transistor” that can convert the charged state of the liquid it’s in to electrical signals.

“… Such a device could co-exist in human body environment, for example, which is mostly liquid.”

Our guess is that these can be used to monitor conditions in humans and assist in drug delivery and efficacy. Rather than starve you for 24 hours before something shiny and stainless examines a part that you would rather not share, you may eventually be able to thank a Salmon for sparing you an indignity.

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