Flavor being secondary to function

PBJLike all weighty discussions between anglers, the notion of what sandwich makes the best accompaniment to fishing is the source of both ire and amusement.

Anglers aren’t likely to pay  attention to expiration dates, certainly the talented ones don’t, and given our propensity to wad leftovers between two sodden slices of Wonder bread, we’re not known for our palate or presentation skills either.

Most admit that, “…does it go with beer?” serves as the only reasonable criteria, but there are the dissenting opinions  …

Mobile anglers will insist the resultant meal should transport well and shouldn’t leak – which effectively eliminates anything with tomato slices, BBQ sauce, or sauerkraut.  Fly fishermen dominate  this category given how the dimensions of the pocket dictates what fills it, and the condition of the foodstuff when deployed.

Boat anglers are most likely to compile the “Dagwood” variant, combining wondrous towers of cheese, veggies, and meat – knowing it will lie undisturbed in the cooler until needed. While known for their ability to transport delicacies into the thick of the fishing, boat anglers are paragons of lunchtime generosity, often sharing their architectural marvel with their quarry when the swells get rough.

Anglers unsure of their success afield will insist whatever it’s made from should have a significant layer of cheese, giving them the dairy-feather double threat.  If the fish ignore your feathered offering, perhaps Pautske’s “Balls O’ Sharp Cheddar” may be the reversal of fortune the trip requires.

Yet with all the careful planning and ritual, most anglers dine on disappointment come mealtime. Most miss the mark when they produce the shapeless lump from pack or vest pocket, whose condiments were buttressed via the fly floatant and DEET that osmosis drew from an adjoining pocket.

Recently I’ve pondered this self same issue, and after considering the various camps,  and the merits of Roast Beef and Sprouts versus Corned Beef with Swiss, I can tell most anglers are missing the Big Picture …

… the greatest angling meal of all time is the venerable Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich, and for the obvious reason – it being the only sandwich found in your vest from last month that you can consume with guilty pleasure on this trip.

No need to scrape the Green Stuff, that’s pure Penicillin, which is right up there with “juice cleanse” on the Wellness scale .

4 thoughts on “Flavor being secondary to function”

  1. PB&J is a pretty good nomination – – got it all: longevity, tidiness, food safety, and not bad on the taste buds. Add a sliced banana and take Elvis fishing. My buddy does sardines wrapped in whole wheat, but I see that as a study in pathology. I moved on from FiberOne bars when I was mistaken once for a duck. Current phase is a bag of jerky and a toothpick, which can later serve as a strike indicator line stopper. Cheap beer as a carb completes the food pyramid, which is not really a pyramid but sort of a mound, or maybe a puddle. More research on angler food habits is needed.

  2. Thin sliced ham, Chik-Fil-a sauce and an eight pack of rolls can fuel a man for days. If it goes “off” it makes some dandy stank chum.

  3. Ah, PB n J. Dress it up with some pickles, spinach, onions and ketchup (I learned this in self defense working as a logger on the Big Blackfoot in MT in the 80’s when one of the crew wouldn’t bring a lunch and mooched off the rest of the crew – this stopped the requests for my lunch) it does all you need a lunch to do.

  4. that last little corner of soft, squishy white bread with a pb&j lamination makes great carp bait

Comments are closed.