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… and you hunch over to protect all the sensitive bits

While I’m not entirely certain what felled me, the romantic version involves the rushing of air overhead, a flash of yellow, and then the snarl of a bright yellow plane climbing for altitude. It’s the Brownliner’s version of hearing the squeal of skidding tires in an intersection, yet instead of the sickening crunch that follows, we get the oily vapors of some nameless chemical descending from above.

While crop dusters are part of the watershed, the guessing game resulting from being dusted ranges the full gamut. Plane screams by overhead and chemical follow; by midweek either the thinning spot on your head has filled in noticeably – complements of fertilizer, or is thinning further, due to Paraquat.

cropduster432

You’re never sure whether the guy saw you and mashed the nipple to cover you in something he thought hilarious, or it’s your luck that made you emerge from the undergrowth just in time to take a shellacking.

I spent a week scratching most of my nether half, from crown to ankles, so the Math is fairly simple. Half the time it’s fertilizer and the other half is something to kill crop pests, and all the time they’re unwelcome.

Or it was that new concentrated purple-label Tide that smelled to high heaven. It’s even scarier to assume something that’s supposed to clean you up is more caustic than airborne Bug B Gone …

4 Comment(s)

  1. Ed | Jul 10, 2014 | Reply

    I’m sure you handled it as well as Cary Grant in North by Northwest.

  2. Igneous Rock | Jul 13, 2014 | Reply

    Ed…next time type -singleboob- then compass navigation isn’t required. He was walking “Wannabe’s” dog Meat. The same dog that has contributed nearly as much to this blog as Keith has. Nothing was mentioned to “Wannabe” whose dog now resembles a Mexican Hairless with a tongue like Central Park.

  3. JP2 | Jul 15, 2014 | Reply

    Say it ain’t so!! Poor Meaty-poo…So has the Oily Shower (can’t you get those on Castro Street?) muffled your blogging prowess or has making muddy fish sculptures in the ditch that was the American River totally taken up your time?
    I’m really bummed that TC is laying low due to the local in-breds around his place…and no fishys to annoy…Up north here we’ve had a solid Central Valley style heatwave going; but we have enough water to wade in,thank goodness…

  4. kbarton10 | Jul 15, 2014 | Reply

    No worries, simply slowed by a couple of forest fires in the area. No water left other than the lake, and that just rebounded from the Butts Fire (Berryessa East) and the Monticello Fire (Berryessa West), so I’ve got nothing to do by cool heels while the lakes gets melted.

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