Mixing the sexes as novices is appropriate, why fly fishing insists on having “for women only” is part of a retail sham – giving them a chance at selling that Puce vest from last year. Women have enough hardship to be cloistered in a lodge without a friend to assist in assimilating the blizzard of information, and lessons on the creek. I think we do ourselves a disservice.

Brownline authors are a sordid lot, living a half-life of darkened ritual, half truths, fawning groupies and poor diet.. Lectured repeatedly on how much Sodium my beef jerky contains, how the chocolate Old Fashioned is the work of Satan, and how countless well meaning health buffs with an unnatural interest in my colon would liberate me [...]

I followed up on last week’s find early Saturday morning, big brown fish roaming unmolested in a pea green bayou held promise, although I couldn’t find any sign of them this morning. Plenty of human sign, as the proximity of the roadbed means you can empty your truck of trash with no one the wiser. [...]

Jean Paul Lipton’s X-Factor nymph has reduced all my smart fish into gluttons. Never seen such an obscene display of pure lust. Mine was a bastardized version using much substitution for what I didn’t have, but it didn’t matter – fish rolled onto the surface with little white flags.

The BeFi (Brownline Economic Financial Indicator) shows that now is not the time to commit to large angling purchases. The “BeFi” is predicated on the price of the venerable Hershey’s with Almonds candy bar, and they’ve announced a 10% increase in that sugarery barometer, effective immediately. Hold onto your cash – our analysts predict at least 20 months before the Stock Market achieves anything considered stability.

Southwick Associates one of many statistical think tanks, claims the Shakespeare Ugly Stik and Orvis are head and shoulders above all else in the rod business. Sampling 16000 anglers yielded these two companies have the greatest following. One of many reasons why statistics are always met with raised eyebrows – especially in an election year.

A World record 260 pound carp landed in Thailand from Bung Sam Lan Lake. Standing in mud, wet, and with a smile as big as they come – a fellow brownliner achieves that moment of grace – just before he’s asked, “Dude, you gonna eat that?”

I may have been hasty when I swore never to guide for money again. Brownlining may be the next big paycheck – and since we can dispense with all the silly ritual of trout fishing, it may even be fun again. ATV’s, excessive drinking, and a rough and ready exterior is all that’s needed – leaven the mixture with some Gabby Hayes, and it’s the big mealticket.

I scouted out more brown water Sunday night, careful not to go where I wasn’t wanted. Interstate 5 provided a steady hum in the background, and I probed for fish in an irrigation trench moving water from rice to corn. Saw some large brown fish but they were too far away to identify. I’m thinking bass or carp, and don’t really care which eats my fly.

A scout trip to new brownline water was in order – I stumbled onto another nice creek filled with blackberry bushes, no trespassing signs, and large fish. The same mixture of species we’ve seen before, only much bigger – as the water is deep and food is plentiful.
I caught two Pikeminnow while wandering through the brambles and saw a lot of large fish.